Confessions Of A Marketing Addict

Confessions Of A Marketing Addict Confessions Of A Marketing Addict

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Friday, October 31, 2008

Thy Name Is Zuma

BWAHAHAHAHA!

You remember all those tips and advices about naming your company or brand? The one that says it may mean something truly hysterical in another culture or country?

Well. Gwen Stefani should've asked Filipinos first what Zuma means to them. For the unenlightened (like Gwen Stefani obviously), that photo is who Zuma is to the Philippines.

Poor kid. If he ever sets foot in the Philippines, people are going to be avoiding him like the plague. Filipinos would be furtively looking at his neck for fear 2 giant snakes will just suddenly unwrap themselves from behind it.

And this is why it sometimes pays to listen to your marketing consultants.

Photo credit: Someone from Pinoy Exchange forum
Labels: Filipino, Gwen Stefani, Philippines, Zuma

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 10:06 AM
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Keeping It Real

With the current financial crisis, there seems to be a lot of discussion going around about budgets and revenues. There's an interesting discussion over at Xing's International Business Club (or was it the International Enterpreneur's Club?) regarding the service sector specifically marketing.

It is a fact that, in times of recession, it's always the marketing budget that is first to be slashed. Why? Another post, another time.

I don't have a problem with slashing marketing budgets especially on advertising. However, if you slash your budget for certain marketing or advertising activities, you must offset it in some other way.

For instance, if your advertising is geared towards awareness - whether creation or maintenance - you need to have a back-up plan before you slash your advertising budget altogether. You don't just slash your advertising that's supposed to create or maintain awareness then simply sit back and hope God does the rest. God, I am sorry to say, is quite busy with Iraq and saving the stock market.

There is this love-hate relationship between clients, marketers and anything advertising. You love advertising when times are good but hate it with a passion when times are hard. You look at your agency billings and come to the awful conclusion that your advertising agency is the spawn of Satan.

What'd they do to deserve THAT?!

Truly, memories can be short. Your agency, my dear, deserves THAT amount because, once upon a time, they were instrumental in creating your brand. Did you actually believe that your product or service was so good, it could've stood on its own without your agency? How delusional of you. Actually, it would've if you're willing to wait for a century. After all, isn't patience a virtue?

Your agency and your advertising helped fast track your brand or company to where it is now. Let us give credit where credit is due. So, yes, they deserve THAT amount. Now, whether they are spawns of Satan or not, only your bottom line can tell you.

You want to reduce your advertising to a miniscule amount? Fine. But, understand that when you do that, the kick ass campaign you were planning for isn't going to happen. Because, to make it happen, we need a serious advertising budget.

If seeing so many zeroes at the end of a CE is offensive to you in these times of crisis, we can cut down those digits but let's also be realistic. Don't dream of owning the latest Manolos if you only have the budget for Parisian shoes.

Philip Kotler said that there is no such thing as recession; only marketers without imagination. I agree. Still, what comes out of our imagination needs money to make it real. How much? That's where the marketer's imagination and creativity matters most. Tight budget is one thing. Unrealistic ones are quite another.

And speaking of unrealistic, 'tis the season of forecasts.

I don't understand why most companies embark on this brain-numbing activity if they insist on putting numbers that would require a major miracle to make it happen.

I am reminded of several clients and ex-bosses who, during forecast approval time, howl: "Why only a very conservative increase?!" Duh. Did you take a look at the marketing budget you're willing to give me?

I can't very well just instruct the agency to beg a TV station to give that spot for free, you know. Nor can I go to a printer and simply tell them to print your marketing collaterals for next to nothing. We are, after all, denuding forests for your campaign. All them environmentalists will scalp me should they find out I killed hardwood trees for free. I believe people who do this are called illegal loggers. For that pathetic budget, I am not about to become one.

To me, a forecast is a commitment. Otherwise, don't waste my time. If I wanted to spend my life doing borders and shading, I'd have been a cartoonist. Not someone going blind from all those Excel files.

As a matter of respect, I always go to the sales people when making my forecast. I conceptualize it but it's them who will make it happen. I don't like synching my forecast on unsuspecting sales people. It guarantees a revolution, the likes of which I do not like to witness.

I believe that a forecast is a commitment between me and sales. They agree to make my forecast a reality and, in turn, they are guaranteed marketing support. That marketing support requires a budget.

Like I said, tight budget is fine but keep your expectations real.
Labels: advertising, advertising agency, forecast, marketing activities, marketing budget

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 8:45 AM
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Thursday, October 30, 2008

Remembering My Years As A Musketeer

My thanks to my college friend, Myrene Academia, for accommodating some of the people I work with (John, BG and Jobert) during her recent concert gig in Davao.

We don't see each other often as we used to when we were in college. So difficult to have coffee with a music star. *lol*

But, Myrene along with Banana and Marya, will always remain special to me. My college years were fun and memorable because of them. Without them, I would've been quite lost in UP. Though we no longer see or communicate as often (life has a way of getting in the way of friendships at times), our bond remains.

Some of my favorite memories of our Musketeer Years:

The Dasmariñas Death March. "My shoes are expensive. My jeans are expensive. And you made me walk?!" Bwahahaha! "Sunny, kelangan na natin ng pamasahe." Double bwahahaha!

Afternoons at Tia Maria in Katipunan. When you are penniless college kids, a pitcher of beer can go for centuries.

Kusina ni Maria at Project 4, QC. Itlog na maalat made specially for me by Marya. Sleepovers at Marie's room where it seems a hurricane hits the damn place every 5 seconds.

Walkathons up to Banana’s house in Tierra Pura. Puff, puff, puff. Damn, that house was far from the gate. Weekends at Banana's house where we spent hours at the gazebo chatting.

Myrene and I running after the bus on our way home from school. Myrene perpetually banging on everything with her drumsticks as she learned to play the drums. Myrene in her long skirt and kick ass boots. "Sunny, I hope this eases the trauma of your birthday." Wow. A…box. How very artiste. No wonder she eventually won Bassist of the Year.

Boy conversations, the likes of which I can never post on this blog.

The rare moments we are together now will always be filled with the memory of the many rites of passage we shared.

Once, there were four - Marie Reyes, Anna Reyes, Myrene Academia and Sunny Cervantes. Then, they grew up and went their separate ways. Marie left for the US and was the first to get married. Anna left for Canada to have an adventure and, eventually, got married. Myrene became a part of 2 band sensations, Imago and Sandwich, and also got married.

I became a marketing consultant who never got married. And the 3 were betting I’d be the first to get married. Hah!

Now, there's four again - Angel, Atari, Junior (coming soon) and - oh fine, Marya! - Sophie. Why is there a dog in this equation?!

There's really nothing else I can say that my heart hasn't already said to them a million times.

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 12:59 AM
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Monday, October 27, 2008

Client Relationships

Interesting post on Guerilla Consulting.

What I like about being a consultant - on top of many things I like about being a consultant - is the freedom to hone my marketing skills by working in different industries. That's what makes it so exciting.

I've been in pharma, FMCG, a little bit of IT, tourism/travel, hotel marketing and, lately, property development.

I remember my first time in Pharma.

Talk about confused. Not only was I confused about everything, I was even confused about spelling. These people are fixated on consonants. Medical terms are like Scrabble. You need to use all 7 tiles to win an additional 50 points. Word is absolutely useless because your entire document is riddled with red underlines.

Being in Pharma was like having a crash medical degree. Oh, the pain. And can I just say it was gross? Well, I'm sooooorrry but it was. All those diseases and sores. On the bright side, I never ate well because, really, how could you? A bleeding eye is not exactly appetizing during lunch. It was difficult having to rearrange my face so that I don't look as grossed out as I felt. I definitely do not have Florence Nightingale qualities.

To date, I think it was Pharma that is the most challenging for me.

As for the rest, I could do them with my eyes closed. The fun was in learning about the market and the product or service. Conceptualizing the campaign wasn’t really rocket science after that.

While I do like being on retainer - well, my bank account does, actually - I agree with the article.

It's not healthy staying too long with a client. You get involve with their daily issues and concerns. You stop being objective. You start treading lightly because, without meaning to, you’ve taken on the mentality of an employee.

I think that's the most dangerous part. When you start thinking of yourself as a part of the organization when, really, you're not.

In addition, long term retainers can turn your brain into mush. There are some instances where I get disoriented when I have to switch industries especially when I've been in one industry too long. Then, I have to begin from scratch again by re-orienting myself with an industry and that can be time consuming. In the meantime, you've got deadlines looming like an execution date.

Generally, 6 months is good for me. However, it rarely happens that I stay only for 6 months. Marketing is a long process so, unless there's someone who can take over for you within the client's organization, you're kinda stuck with that client for quite some time.

It would be unfair to just abandon the ship when there's no replacement captain in sight. After all, it's not just me who worked my ass off on that campaign; it's other people as well within the organization. To just jump ship like that is to have an utter disregard for their hard work as well. Even I cannot be that selfish.

Short term projects, on the other hand, is like a Chinese lauriat. You have the opportunity to sample several dishes and this can do wonders for one’s CV.

Besides, it's fun learning about different industries especially those that are not in my comfort zone. At the risk of sounding like a beauty pageant contestant, it is good for your character. It makes you a well-rounded marketer. Wow. They rhyme.

So, which do I prefer? I dunno. Years later, I haven't made up my mind yet.

I like the long retainers for the financial stability. On top of which, I gain new friends and have the chance of firming up these friendships first before leaving.

I like the short term projects for the brain food it provides. And because, if I'm stuck with an a**hole, my happy thought is that it'll be over in a couple of months.

Yes, it wouldn't be me if I wasn't flaky over the most simple things in life.
Labels: client, client relationship, marketing consultant

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 12:34 PM
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Brand Ambassadors

See! I don't know everything about marketing. For instance, brand ambassadors.

I met this quaint title recently through my friend, Patricia, who handles events for a major tobacco company. No, I cannot say the name of the company because the Anti-smoking Bill whachamacallit prohibits the mention of that brand. Or, something like dut.

Pat and I were haggling for the sponsorship terms of her company for one of my client's events. Free products, check. Merchandising items, check.

Me: Oh, I need promo girls also.
Patricia: Sige, I'll give you 4 and they are not promo girls.
Me: E, what?
Patricia: Brand ambassadors.

Powtah.

Then, today, I met the title again as I was checking my Xing groups. Someone needed brand ambassadors for Skyy Mexico.

Skyy, for the unenlightened, is a vodka brand from San Francisco. FYI, Skyy has a really cool website. This is the first time I've encountered a website that asks you first to put in your birthday before you can enter the site.

Or, maybe I just need to visit porn sites.

Why do we have to make that which was simple so complicated? What was so wrong with "promo girls" that we now have to make it "brand ambassadors"? Really, marketers need to get a life.

Okaaay, maybe promo girls sounds a bit sleazy while a brand ambassador has a respectable ring to it. But it is still the same thing. Girls who need to be pretty and push the brand or products around during an event or campaign.

Yes, a brand ambassador is not as limited in its definition as a promo girl because brand ambassadors can also refer to product endorsers. Whatever happened to just plain ol' "product endorser", anyway?

Maybe, that's why marketers thought of brand ambassadors: to include everyone who can push the product or brand. I guess using brand ambassadors would then include fungi.

I wouldn't be surprised if, someday, becoming a brand ambassador would be like going up the diplomatic chain of command. Before being a brand ambassador, one must first become a brand officer then brand consul, brand vice consul, brand charges d’affaire and, finally - voila! Brand Ambassador.

Stranger things have been known to happen, you know.
Labels: brand ambassador, product endorser, promo girl

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 10:44 AM
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Sunday, October 26, 2008

Personal Shout Outs

Loads of birthdays and weddings last September so these personal shout outs are super late. It wouldn't be me if it wasn't late. Here goes:

Congratulations to Daniela and Christopher!

They got married recently and, according to Maria, it was the most beautiful wedding she went to. The wedding was held in Costa Brava, Spain.

Daniela Arens is Marketing and Communications Director for Linqia, the world's first search engine for online communities and groups.

Congratulations, D! Here's wishing you and Christopher loads and loads of happiness!

A super delayed congratulations as well to M on his church wedding. M is CEO and GM of Hotel Del Rio. Better late than never, Hotelier.

Belated Happy Birthday wishes to:

Some Hijo people: KATS, John, Joki and Ding. My high school friends, Ann and Maricel. Also, my cousin, Nikels, and Brian.

Most of all, MY MOOOMMMMYYYY! Mom, I know it wasn't the best birthday because of your fracture. But, I am just grateful God gave us another year. I love you, Ma. I may not always show it and I may not be the perfect daughter but I hope you take heart that I continue to be a work in progress. Happy birthday, Mommy.

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 9:34 AM
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Travel Forecast 2009

And the fearless forecasts are starting to trickle in.

On the travel/tourism industry, check out Lodging Interactive's Hotel Marketing Trends for 2009.

Research indicates most reductions will be in long range conference attendance and extended vacations. Conferences and vacations are not being eliminated, but regionalized. Vacations are being reduced to activities closer to home. Consumer and business spending is being reduced by shorter stays in upscale resorts and scaling down to lower cost accommodations.

I do not like the word "reduction". Neither do I like the phrase, "closer to home". In fact, I do not like this fearless forecast at all. Because I fear it to be true.

The other shift in hotel marketing budgets will be to online marketing. In the order of importance and value online marketing methods are (1) email (2) website marketing (3) search engine optimization (4), pay per click (5) social media conversational marketing.

The MIS people and I will have a closer relationship in 2009. That's my fearless forecast for myself. Then again, this is Lodging Interactive. Of course, it's all things MIS.

To create effective targeted marketing you need to have a clear understanding of your guest profiles and source feeder markets.

Shouldn't this be elementary by now?

Trip Advisor, on the other hand, lists the Top 10 World Destinations for 2009:

1. Budoni, Sardinia
2. Agia Galini, Crete
3. Petra, Jordan
4. Ardmore, Ireland
5. Peschiera del Garda, Italy
6. Protaras, Cyprus
7. Torre del Mar, Spain
8. Hanioti, Greece
9. Wadduwa, Sri Lanka
10. Goslar, Germany

Hmmm...everyone seems to be discovering their inner Greek or Italian for 2009. I discovered my inner Greek just this year. My inner Italian, I unearthed 5 years ago.

Sri Lanka?! What's to see in Sri Lanka?! Wadduwa, apparently. I google and…Google doesn't know Wadduwa. Oh, wait. Wrong spelling. Sigh. Again, again. Wadduwa. Wow. Talk about a short wiki. Ormoc or Pagudpud probably have longer wikis. Some kinda coconut town west of Sri Lanka. Colombo, to be exact. As a potential tourist, I'm going to pass on them coconuts. I live in a country with way too many coconuts as it is.

Let's see what’s up with Budoni. Why is it #1? The sea...70,000 tourists a year yada yada yada. This place has a funky municipal coat of arms. And...their website is in costruzione. You would think a place that ranks #1 on Trip Advisor would've at least thought of rushing their website. Then again, what am I saying? I've got client websites under construction for 10 million years now. Budoni even has a shorter wiki than Wadduwa. It only looks longer because of the demographics graph.

Agia Galini is a fishing village. Again, the sea. It seems tourists for 2009 have no fear of sunburn, skin cancer or melasma. Unlike yours truly whose vampire traits are showing. Egad! Da Sun, Da Sun! Stupid melasma. As with all Greek destinations, of course, the sea looks amazing.

If you're an archeological or history buff, Petra is it. Wiki says it is an archeological site and UNESCO has declared it a world heritage site. Heeeey! It has amazing photos. At least, it's a change from all that sea and surf.

I dunno about Ardmore. No wiki on the first Google page. I have no patience to search. I'm feeling bloated. But, here's some photos. Seems like a good place to find leprechauns, though. I'm fascinated by leprechauns. Probably because I have the height of one.

Torre Del Mar is in the area of Malaga. My friend, Matthias, lives in this area and he swears by the beauty of the place. Hey, Matthias! Again, the beach. Again, sunburn. Sigh.

Anyway!

It seems the beach is it. As usual. I love the beach but my skin doesn't love it anymore. My derma says I should stay away from the sun. Such an agony to try and remember applying sunblock on my face each time I go out.

When was the last time I was at the beach? A few weeks ago but it doesn't count because I was working. Yes, I have to go to the beach, try out the beach and that constitutes work. Damn! Some people have it sooooo good. Except it was raining while I was at the beach. Stupid weather won't even agree with me. The gods said, nope, it has to rain so you know how it feels like to be here while it's raining like hell. Fine, fine, PAYN!

It seems to me that tourists want to try out new destinations. The more difficult to find on Google, the better. They should visit the Philippines, then.

And so - happy traveling, people! Don't forget to bring sunblock. My derma says anything less than SPF30 is not effective. Whatever.
Labels: forecast, hotel marketing, tourism, tourist, travel

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 9:04 AM
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Pepsi's New Look?

Oh.

According to Seth Godin, Pepsi is trying out a new logo in the hopes of increasing market share. I didn't know that, to increase market share, all I had to do was create a new logo. Well, dang! I wish I knew that earlier so I didn't have to wrack my brains.

I cannot, for the life of me, get the logic.

To me, increasing market share takes more than just changing your logo. I could launch into a lecture here on branding but I don't want to because it's a Sunday and I feel bloated.

Instead, let's just check out Pepsi's might-soon-to-be logo.

It's...zzzzzzzzzzzz. Their agency is overpaid.
Labels: logo, market share, Pepsi

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 8:22 AM
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Saturday, October 25, 2008

What CEOs Want

Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,

So goes the annoying Spice Girl hit. Okaaay, I didn't really think it was annoying back then. But, back then, Victoria Beckham didn't look like Anorexic Barbie.

Why don't I tell you instead what the gods check in a marketing plan? This way, I save you the anguish of wracking your brains trying to figure out what will please them and get that all important ok.

Sidebar: A friend recently remarked that everything I told her that her CEO would ask about her marketing plan was...well, asked. How you do that, my friend wondered. 15 years of handling CEOs of all shapes and sizes kinda hones your fortune telling skills, girlfriend.

Just because your marketing plan was written in a nice Tahoma font, amply bordered, bulleted, numbered and colored, it doesn't mean it's enough to gain the boss' approval. Yes, CEOs are notorious for scrutinizing a marketing plan especially the forecast part. They are not a dying breed; in fact, their kind overpopulates the planet. They should be blamed for global warming.

On what do CEOs train their infrared scopes on, then?

Objectives. Be very careful when stating your objectives. Do not write them when you haven't had breakfast yet. You will end up with an ulcer.

To build awareness. How will you measure it?! Err...if you will allow me to finish, I can answer that towards the end of the marketing plan where it states Post-Evaluation.

To increase sales from x% to x%.

Evil-tempered CEO: Why are you aiming for such a low increase?!
Harassed You: Ahmmm...we don't have the resources to pull off a bigger increase and, given the short duration of the promotion, this increase is already our best effort.
Evil-tempered CEO: So why don't you have a longer promo duration then?!
Harassed You: We don't have the budget and manpower for it.
Evil-tempered CEO: Well, if you re-wrote your budget, I might reconsider.
(Like an idiot, you do and, naturally, he shoots the revised budget.)
Evil-tempered CEO: Why'd you increase the budget by so much?!
Harassed You: Because you wanted this much in incremental sales!
FLAKY CEO: Yes but not at that budget!

Spell ulcer.

Target Market. Here, you will encounter the top favorite CEO remarks. And these are (in no particular order):

This doesn't seem to be a growing or profitable market. Nothing ever grows fast or profitable enough for them.

We should be targeting another segment because our product is the best! This usually comes from a CEO who's had too much coffee before breakfast. Best not to tell him that...errr...no, ours is not the best. It is a guarantee that he will bellow at you. HOW CAN YOU MARKET SOMETHING YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN?!

And you will spend the rest of the day in excruciating agony.

These people cannot afford our products. At which point, it is advisable to explain to him your target market's demographics and psychographics in a way he will understand. Like in fairytale form.

How big is this market? And by how much is it growing? And here, you must show him every single graph, chart and market study known to Zeus and man.

Budget. How do I explain this delicately? 95% of CEOs are notoriously good at financials. Ergo, if you cannot add, subtract, multiply and divide, best to solicit the help of your financial comptroller.

And, no, you cannot put any ol' number you like there. You don't know how much the damn posters cost? Call Purchasing. Do not put 10,000 posters there no matter how tempting the cost per unit is if you print in bulk. Not only will you be accused of denuding forests, you will also be hauled off for drug testing.

Remember: you don't only spend for your marketing materials; you also spend for other quaint things like manpower and utilities. So, include those in your budget or you will never hear the end of it.

Forecast or Projected Revenue/Sales. Without fail, almost all CEOs cannot wait to get to this portion. This is like dessert for them. Or not. It all depends on the final figure you put.

Is this realistic? Are you sure you can hit this forecast? You're barely going to make break-even!

Ergo, seek divine intervention to survive the interrogation.

Important note on Excel files: Just because you can understand your Excel file doesn't mean your CEO will as well. It helps to put borders and shadings. In short, don't give your CEO brain tumor with your Excel file.

Often, I try to make sure the whole file fits only on 1 page so it's easier for them to understand. Most CEOs I've worked with prefer it that way. They have magnifying glasses to help them with the teeny, tiny fonts.

For those who don't want to go blind, I go the extra mile by pasting together the sheets so they can read it in just one whole sheet. Why? Because the sooner they get through the damn Excel files, the faster you get their approval. Or, disapproval. Again, depends on how well you did your Math. Let's hope you didn't do it while sleepwalking.

Of course, these are not the only things you put in a marketing plan. But, like I said, these are the points they zero in on.

Oh, and did I tell you the bad news? Approved does not always mean approved. It means "I can always change my mind anytime I like." This depends on how the planets are aligned. Disapproved, however, means exactly that: disapproved.

Now, Anakin, go and dazzle your CEO. May the force be with you.
Labels: creating a marketing plan, forecast, marketing, marketing budget, marketing campaign

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 9:28 AM
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Friday, October 24, 2008

How Not To Get Shot

Often, marketers think (nay, believe is probably the apt word) that their concepts can take a life of its own by just merely talking about it.

Errr...no. It doesn't quite work that way. Talking about a marketing campaign alone doesn't make it real. Or, workable. This is one of those things in life where, to breathe life into it, you must do more than talk about it. Talk is cheap. Didn't your mother tell you that?

A brilliant idea for a marketing campaign is not brilliant if it can be shot down to a thousand pieces in just a matter of seconds. Your marketing campaign should be able to hold up to minute scrutiny. Think thesis defense. If you cannot defend it, it is useless.

Here are some techniques I've used over the years:

Do your homework. Don't just sit there and say, "I think this will work blah blah blah..." Well, great. But how do you know? Have you checked your competition? Have you scanned the industry? Is your organization capable of executing it? Do you have the resources to get it off the ground?

In short, research. A rather bad word because who in their right mind likes doing research? I don't.

Of all the things I hate about research, it's the first step towards doing it. You don't know where to begin. You're faced with so much data (or, lack thereof) that you do not know how to get your brain neurons to rally together. In my case, this takes a considerable amount of Coke Light and smokes to get my cerebellum functioning. (Is cerebellum the thing that makes your brains work? I dunno. Cerebellum just sounded so...medical.)

Doing your homework (and doing it very well, emphasis on very well) will tell you if yours is really a brilliant idea. Because, you know, the earth's population is now in billions. Ergo, your brain is not the sole repository of brilliant ideas no matter what your mother told you.

Do the numbers. Again, another task I hate because, really, my relationship with calculators is one of pure hate. I have been known, however, to fall in love with finance people and assistants who are very good with Math. Hello, Icy and Jorgie! How I became a marketer without understanding how a calculator works is one of the greatest mysteries in my life. That and my fascination for Mexican telenovelas.

Don't just send to your boss or client a marketing plan that doesn't include a projected budget and forecast because what's he going to do with it? Conduct a seance to summon the dead to tell him whether it's profitable or not?

A marketing plan is only good if you've got the figures for it. It becomes brilliant when that forecast actually happens. At the end of the day, a marketing plan is all about making money. Don't let anybody tell you otherwise. To create awareness, to strengthen brand equity, to solidify market position, to increase market share yada yada yada all mean one thing - TO MAKE MONEY.

I really cannot understand why we can't just say that on our marketing objectives. I want to make money. Period. Isn't that less stressful? Instead, you wrack your brains thinking of pretty phrases that scream, "I am a marketer!" And this is why I need coffee constantly. Because I'm running out of pretty phrases to use.

A forecast, like your marketing plan, means nothing if it doesn't happen. So, like The Omen, doing the numbers will come back to haunt you after the campaign. Because, my dear, you need to measure it. You didn't get a brain tumor doing your forecast only to leave it hanging there. Unless, you work out of a Laundromat.

Make sure you can measure your marketing campaign's effectiveness in numbers. Or course, awareness can be measured. You just need a monstrous marketing budget to do it. But, generally, any awareness campaign's effect can be tracked through revenue. Because, duh, how can you have revenue if only the Klingons know that your product or service exists?

This is the part that I often neglect, the post-evaluation of any campaign. I know, I know. But, by the time I get to the post-evaluation, I am planning another campaign so there. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. However, this doesn't mean you should follow my bad example. Strive to be better than me by being more disciplined.

These steps, Virginia, can save you from sniper fire.
Labels: forecast, market research, marketers, marketing, marketing budget, marketing campaign

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 12:39 PM
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Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Of Consultants And Prostitutes

Hahaha! I found this on a discussion about consultants over at Internations:

What is the difference between a consultant and a prostitute?

You work very odd hours.
You are paid a lot of money to keep your client happy.
You are paid well but your pimp gets most of the money.
Your client pays for your hotel room plus your hourly rate.
You are not proud of what you do.
Creating fantasies for your clients is rewarded.
If a client beats you up, the pimp just sends you to another client.
You are embarrassed to tell people what you do for a living.
People ask you what you do and you can't explain it.
When you leave to go see a client, you look great, but return looking like hell
Everyday you wake up and tell yourself you're not going to be doing this stuff for the rest of your life.

Oh relax, fellow consultants. You should be used to this by now. Besides, we take ourselves way too seriously, it's why shrinks earn more than we do. Learn to laugh at yourself. Don't you read Reader's Digest? Laughter is the best medicine.

On that same discussion, someone said something that made me smile. Oh Lord, I forgot who it was, sorry. Anyway, he said: the consultant knows where to find the book; the expert has read it.

Very well said.

I know where to find the book. I have read it. It is why I am fabulous at what I do.
Labels: consultants, marketing consultant

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 7:50 AM
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Monday, October 20, 2008

Ivanka's Fresh Perspective

And so she is not an idiot after all.

I received my bachelor's degree in real estate from the Wharton School of Finance at the University of Pennsylvania, graduating magna cum laude.

Ordinarily, it would've been easy to dismiss her as one seeing that:

I serve as Vice President of the Trump Organization and on the board of directors of Trump Entertainment Resorts.

Well, wouldn't you be VP as well if your daddy was The Donald?

Then, again, I'm being judgmental. As usual. I watched her on The Apprentice and, somehow, she didn't seem all that amazingly intelligent to me. I finally figured out why. Because she seemed to try too hard to come across as that.

The way she asked her questions, the way she held herself and even the way she sat. It screamed, "I'm intelligent! Believe me! Please! I'm more than just Daddy's Girl and I didn't get here because of my Daddy!" Okaaay, Ivanka, settle down and get a grip.

It's understandable, though. You're beautiful. You're young. You're thin. You have great hair and you model. Your father is richer than God. One of your homes is called Mar-A-Lago. Surely, you cannot be intelligent as well.

Most people (yes, people like me) would think that way and, therefore, dismiss her easily as a fruitcake pretending to have a brain. It's way easier to think someone has a hideous flaw than accept that some people were just awake when God was giving out blessings in abundance. Such is human nature and I am only human.

Although I have to admit I'm wondering about this Lunch Trade thing of hers that guarantees a revolutionary change on the way people take their lunch.

Please don't tell me it's some wheat bread thingamajig because it says there "it will become one of the largest multi-company lunch trades, bringing a fresh-tasting, healthy change to the office lunch." Suddenly, I'm envisioning carrots. No, it couldn't possibly be that. She graduated magna cum laude, for God's sakes! From Wharton! I barely made it to my own graduation.

She deserves a break from the harsh criticism and judgment. It's not her fault she was born looking that way and with a bank account that would scare the World Bank itself.

Maybe I'm her long-lost sister? I can only wish. Then again, it could be challenging having to explain your father’s hair constantly.
Labels: Donald Trump, Ivanka Trump, Lunch Trade

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 12:27 AM
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Sunday, October 19, 2008

Mastering The Art Of Highway Robbery

'Tis not the time of the year to be soliciting for sponsorships. Why? I have 3 words: No More Budget. However, when did that ever stop a marketer from asking, begging, harassing and just plain pestering potential sponsors for money? Not when you're a marketer worthy of your title.

So. When in excruciating need of sponsorships, best to remember some things that marketing books and experts will never tell you. Because it goes against everything responsible marketers should do.

An off-shoulder blouse not only gets your foot inside the door, it guarantees free products. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I set the women's movement back by a hundred years, sue me. If you can't get them by sheer charm, glimpses of your anatomy will certainly point them to the bank's direction. Of course, you use this tactic only when dealing with men. And, of course, I assume you have the correct anatomy statistics for it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is discriminating to fat women, kill me.

Like the attack on Normandy, best to do a surprise assault when potential sponsors are famished and thirsty. This is why the off-shoulder blouse is necessary. The technique works better when they are practically hallucinating from hunger. Sorta like an oasis in the middle of a desert.

In this case, packaging is a necessary evil. Aside from the off-shoulder blouse, it is imperative you try to clone Giselle Bundchen's looks. This is not one of those times where sheer intelligence alone will propel you to greater heights. Not when time and budget is of the essence. The Godzilla look is clearly not the way to go.

Use your Rolodex. It helps when half of your long-time friends are in the same field as you. Remind them of the debts they owed you when you were all still destitute. Rehash how they never returned the Tom Cruise movie you cherished beyond all else. And, yes - did you remember how I covered up for you when your mother called me?! The effect is like the parting of the Red Sea.

If you can swing an immediate appointment with the decision maker, do it. You do not have time to dilly dally with the minions. Do not waste your breath on the gatekeepers. Give them a box of cinnamon rolls instead and quickly get them out of your way. Bribery is not a sin when one needs sponsors pronto. You can always go to confession later.

Come prepared. Do your homework. Don't be the idiot schmuck who goes there without knowing how to pitch the event to your potential sponsor. If they cannot be swayed by branding opportunities, whip out the volume-value analysis. Do not be subtle. Remind them exactly how much they owe your company in sales. Threaten them with a loss of account (assuming their account with you is considerable) and, no, do not be ladylike about it. This is not a soiree.

Do not leave without getting anything. In writing. See who will drop dead first from exhaustion but, for goodness' sakes, make sure it isn't you. Ergo, drink your vitamins and eat breakfast for 20 people. Fortify your bones with calcium. It's going to be a long day and it will not help your cause if you have an osteoporosis episode while negotiating.

Chutzpah, chutzpah and chutzpah. Confidence is for prom queens and children. You are a woman of the world. You can conquer anything.

Be ruthless. You are not in the running for sainthood. Some other time, maybe, just not this time because you need money. Now. To paraphrase a famous quote, good girls gain friends; bad girls gain sponsors.

Yes, I did all that and, yes, I got everything I wanted. In a matter of 1 week. Sometimes, I amaze myself.

Warning: These strategies are not for the faint of heart.
Labels: marketer, marketing, marketing budget, sponsorships

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 11:59 PM
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Stick To Your Guns

Read Laura Ries' article on sticking to your brand in times of an economic crisis.

Brands that stay strong and survive no matter what the weather are those that stay consistent. Your brand has meaning and strength only if it owns something in the mind. And the more you adjust and tinker with that meaning, the weaker your brand becomes.

Amen!

As Ries pointed out, companies have a tendency to do anything and everything when there's an economic crunch. They forget that, as with all everything in life, the sun will come out tomorrow (Annie, is dat chu?). You just have to learn how to hang in there.

Often, I tell clients to stick to their guns even when the going gets tough. In times of recession, it is your marketing plan that will help you survive. It doesn't guarantee anything but it is infinitely better than losing your focus and letting panic take over. Of course, I am assuming that your marketing plan is solid, cohesive, coherent and efficient. If you didn't do your homework when you conceptualized it, best not to go down this route and, instead, hire the services of a fortune teller.

As a consultant, you can only recommend so much and, then, you must shut up for fear of loss of limb or, worst, death. Especially true when you've got clients who forget they hired a marketing consultant because marketing is not their area of expertise.

At the end of the day, it is they who decide, not me. It isn't my money; it is theirs. While it is my obligation to help them protect their business interests with the right marketing strategy, I can only do so much. Because what will you do with a client who won't listen to you?

Sometimes, I find myself re-wiring my marketing plan to suit the wishes of my clients despite the fact that my marketing judgment tells me I shouldn't. I try my best to come up with something that will not totally deviate from the original marketing plan so that, when the economic chaos has passed, it's relatively easy to switch back. Doesn't always happen that I can do this because - hey! I don't walk on water. Still, I try.

So you re-wire and re-wire. Client is happy. Cash is flowing in despite the economic hardship. When the storm has passed, they wonder what in hell's bells happened that the cash stopped flowing just when the economy got better. And why are we stuck with these kinds of customers? Weren't we targeting Mr. A? How come we're just getting the missus now? What happened to Mr. A?

Uh...he left. That's what happened. He left because you forgot him and went after his wife instead. Since you didn't want him, he went to look for someone else who did. Now, you're stuck with his wife and she's a miser.

Get him back! Get him baaaaaccck! He's the one we want, not her!

And so the agony of re-branding begins. An agony that should never have happened in the first place if you just listened to your marketing consultant and stuck to the marketing strategy.

How strange to re-brand when what you're really doing is simply switching back to your original marketing strategy. But, because you deviated from it so much, you cannot just switch back. You must re-brand. And re-branding, my dear, costs more than your original marketing plan.

I am not saying you shouldn't come up with temporary measures when times are hard. Of course, you do. Only a fool doesn't. But make sure these measures are all aligned with your original marketing strategy. Do not come up with one that's totally different from what you've planned to do because the effects will be ugly. That ugliness could last longer than the economic crunch.

Which is also why your marketing plan must be flexible.

Do not be so enamored with it that you do not leave room for adjustment. We fall in love with men, not marketing plans. And even the men we change when they've outlived their purpose. Same principle with a marketing plan.

You cannot predict what happens to the world tomorrow. A marketing plan that doesn't leave room to move about is doomed.

That's how Madonna and Guy Ritchie headed for the divorce courts.
Labels: branding, brands, marketing strategy

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 9:28 AM
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Bored? Try This!

There is always something about entrepreneurs creating niche businesses that I find appealing.

For starters, I get curious how they came up with their business idea. Did it hit them one morning as they were having coffee? Was it while they were on their way to work? Did it happen while they were in the shower? Some business stories I've heard are fascinating.

Then, there's the actual business itself.

I get fascinated by how they discovered the market they are targeting. How they worked their way to penetrating that market. And, most of all, their wonderful marketing budgets. Yes, I'm fixated on marketing budgets now. That time of the year.

One such business is Andre Grashof's Mystery Agency.

It took me a while to figure out the business concept and I'm still not sure if I got it right. But, apparently, you go on an adventure vacation where you play the role of a criminal investigator. Your adventures are based on real cases. Mystery Agency prepares the whole adventure trip for you and books you in the most exclusive hotels and locations all over the globe.

Yes, it's only for the ultra rich. Or, to use the politically-correct word (as "rich" now just sounds rude and only the nouveau would actually use the word), "high net worth individuals." What can I say? The world is evolving ever so strangely that we now feel we must use 4 words where 1 would've sufficed.

Mystery Agency picks my mind because this market of HNWI is fascinating. Admit it. We get fascinated by what rich people do all the time. When you've got millions, how do you spend it? Or do you? And on where?

When I visited their website, I automatically assumed they were targeting men. The concept of being Sherlock Holmes seemed such a guy thing. Okaaay, I'm being judgmental as Andre pointed out. There are women who like being criminal investigators. I just don't know of one except for Nancy Drew and she doesn't know me at all.

When I have my wits again with me (after a grueling 2-week business trip), I'm going to grill Andre some more.

Another business concept I ran into, I discovered through the Branding Blog.

It targets boys who like big toys although, at the risk of being called judgmental again, I will concede that some women may like driving a bulldozer or tractor. I just don't because I'm a midget and can barely climb up inside an SUV. Probably why I don't own an SUV because I would need a crane to get on the driver's seat.

Anyway, the company is called...I don't know what it's called. What IS the company name? Someone forgot to put that crucial piece of information.

The idea is for boys to play in a 10-acre sandbox. They drive bulldozers, tractors, whatever. Apparently, there's an adrenaline rush when one is driving a bulldozer. I just cannot relate to it because I don't like driving. At all.

Business Turn Around is right. People will pay for experiences that are new, exciting and different.
Labels: business trends, Luxury marketing, new business

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 8:48 AM
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Monday, October 13, 2008

Sex In Marketing

On a business trip now but I just really had to blog about this.

Laszlo Revesz of Image Factory posted this thread on Marketer's Playground over at Xing. It seems I wrote something about sex in marketing 2 years ago and Laszlo kinda took it from there.

Two years ago almost to the day, Sunny Cervantes, our Marketing Girl posed these questions: "Do you think women react less favorably towards marketing materials that use sex (or anything sexual) blatantly? Do men react more favorably? Is it really a Mars vs. V
enus thing? When it comes to sex on ads, what stretches the limits for a woman and for a man? What would be offensive to women and to men?"

There was only one answer, coming from the author of the ad that opened this thread. I would now try to rephrase her question: Are sexual innuendos offensive, cheap marketing "eye catchers"?

I am asking this question because recently my firm, Image Factory ran a somewhat similar condom ad that we took one step further both with the "graphic" imagery and the pun "hint" in the text.

When we ran the ad we had split reactions: half of the responses were positive and the other half negative, so we still don't have a conclusive answer to our dilemma: Were we on the wrong path with this ad, or should we pursue it?

This is the ad:

Whatchutink?

This was my reply:

Hey Laszlo!

I just had to reply even though I am now on a hectic business trip. I had a starring role, after all, on your thread. Hehehe.

My initial reaction to the ad? EWWWW! *lol*

Then, I put on my marketing hat.

I like the tagline, Safety Comes First. Not just like. I love it, in fact. Even with just the condom there, the tagline captures the message perfectly. The bees (are they bees or flies or - what are they?) was kinda overdoing it. I found it a bit hard sell but that's me as a girl reacting.

Personally, I would've just preferred 1 fly there (or whatever they are) and the fly not doing anything. Just sitting there on top of it. Actually, no flies and just the condom alone would be just as effective. I think everyone knows what a condom is and what it's for so 4 flies humping is really unnecessary. And that's me as both a girl and a marketing strategist reacting. For me, you don't have to pound the point on the target market's head. In my head, I'm thinking, "I get it! Now, get a grip!"

In the end, it really depends where you're showing the ad and to whom you're showing it. Some countries and cultures could probably appreciate the humor and pun of the ad. Some may not. I think your dilemma will be better resolved if you did an ad test in wherever you intend to run it instead of doing it among respondents who do not fit the profile of your target market.

If you ran that here in the Philippines, I doubt if anyone would soon be having sex without thinking of cockroaches and termites. Then again, that would be good for our problem with overpopulation. Hahaha!

But whatever it is, that is certainly a provocative ad. Just how tolerant will the audience / market be to that ad will heavily depend on where you're showing it and to whom. That, in turn, will decide how many condoms will be sold.

Cheers, S.

Yes, I am copying and pasting. Wouldn't you if you were on a business trip???
Labels: advertising, marketing, print ads, sex

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 1:59 PM
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Sunday, October 05, 2008

Love Your Own

Yesterday, while held hostage on SLEX traffic, I was left with nothing to do but listen to radio blather.

Can someone please tell me why our FM radio people insist on talking and sounding like Americans when WE ARE NOT? I forgot which radio station it was that I was listening to but the DJ was doing an interview with this somebody rap group from New York.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah...you was flying in through Philippine Airlines…" Or some such shit. All I heard every 5 seconds was "yeah, yeah, yeah" said in obvious imitation of the rapper's Bronx accent. WTF?!

If I was anywhere near that radio station, I'd hit the DJ with a bat.

I know about colonial mentality and all about target markets, ok. Do we really have to be annoying cloying about speaking and sounding like Americans? WE ARE NOT! What's so wrong with talking in good ol' Philippine-accented English? We are Filipinos, after all. American English is not our primary language; Filipino is.

Personally, I like hearing English being spoken with a distinct accent. I even like hearing Tagalog spoken with a regional accent. I find it all quaint and unique. It's very charming.

French-accented English is very sexy. Italian-accented English is hot. German-accented English is cute. Bisaya-accented English is musical.

Did you hear Michelle Van Eimeren speak Tagalog when she was here recently? Australian-accented Tagalog is uber-hot.

Sometimes, I hear local actors or actresses speak their dialects and I find it delightful. Lucy Torres-Gomez often does it on her show, Sweet Life, and it just bolsters the fact that Cebuano/Visayan is a lovely dialect. Whenever I'm in Cebu or Davao, I eavesdrop shamelessly on conversations around me if only to hear people speak in Visayan. Often, I tell people to speak in Visayan even if I don't understand it because I just really like to hear the dialect being spoken.

My roots are from Iloilo and Ilonggos are famous for their musical lilt. I wish I could speak Tagalog with an Ilonggo accent but I don’t. My Tagalog is distinctly Manileña. But if I could speak it with an Ilonggo accent, I wouldn't mind.

Ilonggos have a reputation for being malambing (charming) and who wouldn't want to be thought of as malambing? As it is, I get annoyed when people gasp in shock that I have Ilonggo roots because their initial reaction is almost always, "Why aren't you malambing?!" As if I have some incurable disease that warrants being cast away on a deserted island.

My Ilocano friends are also a joy to listen to when they speak English. I remember this incident in the washroom of Jollibee Baguio before. The lady beside me said, "The door was falling apart, ngay." I thought it was really cute.

When I'm in Baguio or anywhere up north where Ilocano is the dominant dialect, I try to inject local expressions into my Tagalog. "Ngay, ngarud..." That's about how far my Ilocano goes. I used to understand it perfectly well, now I don't. That's what happens when a relationship abruptly ends. So does your grasp of the local dialect.

When down South, I also try to punctuate my Tagalog with the local slang except people mistake me for being Bisaya. So, they speak in rapid-fire Visayan which leaves me totally spaced out. But, if only to hear them speak, I don't mind at all.

I liked listening to the rapper dude speak in that distinct Bronx way because...duh...he's from the Bronx. I did not appreciate it from the Filipino DJ who probably grew up somewhere in Pasig.

Of course, I understand that, on Manila radio, you cannot always speak English with a regional accent. But, you don't also have to be OA in speaking it with an American twang. Just speak decent English, for God's sakes!

On this blog, I would like to use Tagalog more often. I am often tempted to write in Filipino gay speak which is so much fun to use.

Except I can't.

I started this blog with my foreign friends and business associates in mind so, out of respect for them, I have to use a language they can understand. You do not change languages in the middle of everything just because you feel like it. It's rude, rude and very rude. Sort of like suddenly speaking in a foreign language without saying "excuse me" to those who cannot speak or understand it. That kind of rude.

The Filipino language and its many dialects are fascinating in its diversity. We do not have to apologize to the Western world for it by mimicking Jenny from the Bronx.
Labels: dialect, English, Filipino, Ilocano, Ilonggo, language, Philippines, Tagalog

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 6:59 AM
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Friday, October 03, 2008

OFW Para Sa Kapamilya

My uber-girlfriend, Krista Goon, pointed me to a website her Auntie Nina and friends put up.

OFW Para Sa Kapamilya is a website that caters primarily to the medical and psychological needs of Overseas Filipino Workers and their families. Behind the site is a group of medical doctors who offer medical help and care by tapping the power of the internet.

I like the site for its novel concept. It's not your usual OFW site where it's all about the remittance. I like the fact that it aims to help address the psychological and emotional issues that often surround OFWs and their families.

OFWs are Filipinos who are working abroad. We refer to them as Bagong Bayani (new heroes) because of the enormous contribution that their remittances bring to the Philippine economy. Most of them are forced to work abroad as domestic helpers and caregivers because of the difficulty in finding good paying jobs in the country.

It's difficult being an OFW and even more difficult being the child of an OFW. Often, marriages and families are torn apart because one member is an OFW. The distance is the primary culprit. When stuck in a foreign land where the nearest and only emotional support (or what passes for emotional support) you can get can be found at the Philippine embassy (if there is one there), such a situation can take its toll on the entire family.

Every day, I hear sob stories on the news. Somebody got raped by her employer. Someone got accused unjustly of stealing and is now rotting in some Godforsaken jail. Many come home in a box.

A website like Krista's Auntie Nina's, if marketed right, can be an enormous help to OFWs and their families.

As registered members, they can seek help through the network of medical doctors that the site provides. If you're working in the Middle East and you suddenly found out your mother has a terminal illness, you can go to the site and ask for a referral to a medical specialist. You can even seek help to deal with what you're going through as a result of your absence from your loved one who is terminally ill.

Children of OFWs have their own specific link where they can discuss their issues with having OFW parents. I like this part especially because, if I think about it, I am an OFW child. I never really felt my parents were away so, in that, I'm luckier than most children of OFWs. But I can empathize with how it means to have your parents away from you and you're sick. When I'm sick, I want my mommy to come home and cook me chicken soup. But, how's she going to do that when she's 16,000 nautical miles away from me, right?

I hope the site really takes off. It's a good site servicing a good cause.

Krista and her hubby, Nic, own and run Red Box Studio, in Malaysia.
Labels: OFWs, Overseas Filipino Workers Philippines

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 1:30 PM
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. . .

Sunny S. Cervantes,
The Marketing Girl

...

Read My Confessions

This marketing consultant
feeds her writing
frustrations by
churning out
voluminous
marketing plans.

Welcome to my world!

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This Month's Nice Words

O-F C-O-U-R-S-E,
I bribed them.

Seriously, though,
MANY THANKS for the
privilege of working
with all of you and
the honor of being
considered your friend.

...

"Sunny is a pleasure
to work with.
She takes a practical
approach to business
problems and is very
precise and accurate
in explaining situations.

-Alex Blom-
Owner, Media Diseno

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Sunny's Personal Blog

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