Confessions Of A Marketing Addict Confessions Of A Marketing Addict
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Saturday, September 30, 2006
ADVISORY

Power failure due to super typhoon, Milenyo. Power might be restored in 2 weeks. Until then, I cannot reply to messages immediately. Thank you for your understanding.

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Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Digg The Angry Customer Expert

My friend,
Chuck Dennis, submitted two stories over at Digg. I already discussed the first one here. The second article can be found on his company's newsletter.

Here's Chuck:

Hi folks,

I recently posted a couple of business articles on
www.digg.com, and am hoping to get a little exposure that way. It would be greatly appreciated if you could help me get the ball rolling by visiting the articles, and click the “digg it” box next to the article summary.

One article is titled
Improving Your Business Starts by Assessing Your Current Practices and can be found at http://digg.com/search?s=improving. The other article is called Angry Customers Can Help Your Business If You Don't Let Them Drive You Nuts and can be found at http://www.digg.com/search?s=angry+customers.

Thank you for even considering doing this for me.


Chuck is Vice President of Knowledgence Associates and can be contacted here.

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Exclusively Facebook

Aha! Finally, I got to register at
Facebook.

I had heard so much about it from Dean. Fearing that I will lose my "officially cool" status, I naturally itched to get on Facebook. Besides, with the impending merger of Facebook and Yahoo - not to mention that Wall Street denizens are raving about its potential value (supposedly US$1bn) - I cannot not be on Facebook.

I register. And register. And register. These people do not want me to register. I am from a third world country. Ergo, I do not merit a registration. I will totally blame the Philippine politicians if I lose my "officially cool" status.

Today, though, Dean says Facebook now has an open registration. I rushed over to register. And register. And register. Gawd, this thing does not make registration easy. What is this site again? A social networking site? They're not very social, that much I can tell you.


Finally, I am registered.

I see the same forms I had to fill up for Friendster, MySpace and all those other networking sites. THAT'S IT?! All that anguish for this?! It's a rainy Wednesday. I'm using a service unit that has an internet speed similar to that of a turtle. I do not feel like filling out any of the forms. I am not up to the challenge of posting a profile description that will scream, "I am cool, hip and happenin'."

According to Sean Carton's article on Facebook, though, this move to open up is not a good thing. Apparently, the appeal of Facebook is its exclusivity. I can understand that which explains my two country club memberships. After all, who in his right mind wants to be numbered along with the pedestrian masses, correct?

From what I understand of the article, Facebook was originally set up to connect Harvard alumni. Ahhhh...the enclave of the supremely intelligent or so they like to think. Sadly (and I am sure it will hurt when I point this out), Harvard does not have the sole copyright to intelligence.

I came from the University of the Philippines in Diliman, the Harvard of the Philippines. It takes intelligence to get into UP but it takes a little more than that to survive it. I did but barely. And - Hell, NO! I am not repeating it again neither am I sending my only child there. Are you kidding me?!

I also came from Assumption Convent where I spent the first 12 years of my education. It is undoubtedly and undisputedly the country's most exclusive private school for girls. Old Girls (as we dyed-in-the-wool Assumption natives like to call our alumni) are prized in the marriage market and social circles much like the fatted calf.

Unfortunately, the brand name Assumptionista also connotes all things shallow and stupid which is totally untrue if we are to judge the contents of this blog. By the way, for all the reputation that Assumptionistas get, let us not forget that the Philippines' only two female presidents are both Old Girls. No, we do not produce scientists. We only produce socialites, models and the occasional President of the Republic of the Philippines. Oh, who cares that they reduced the country to smithereens? They're still presidents and you're not. Eat that, you sh*t!

Exclusive? Hell, Assumption invented the word. So, yes, I get the appeal of exclusivity. If your self-esteem is low and mine certainly is not, being denied registration at Facebook will kill you. It didn't even faze me.

I am, however, mystified. If you want it to be exclusive, why even discuss it? The reason why country clubs have this air of mystery that lends to fascination is precisely because they are never heard. Like old money. It is seen but never heard. So to have articles screaming that Facebook is probably worth US$1Bn is just so nouveau which, naturally, destroys the very essence of being exclusive.

Exclusivity means whispering the number or, perhaps, communicating it via mental telepathy. It is not shouting about it and then closing the doors on unsuspecting faces. That's just tacky and very Saudi money.

As for me, I will keep my Facebook in the same way I let my Ryze sleep for decades. One day, when I am bored, I will fix it.

I don't need exclusivity. I am already very exclusive.

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The King Is Dead

Behold the new OpenBC logo. Errr...Xing, I mean.

It's not bad. I actually like it. I like that particular shade of green. I think it's also more memorable than the current OpenBC logo which, while more business-like, is...well, blah.

And so many, many violent reactions to the new brand name.

Everywhere you go on OpenBC, it's all about Xing. People, get a grip. We are going to be Xing'd. In fact, we are already Xing. Deal with it. And, yes - we are all marketers and business people with very fragile egos who must, naturally, put in our 2-cents' worth or perish trying. BUT - Lars (Good grief, what was his family name again? The guy who founded OpenBC? Lars someone.) has already done the dirty deed. It is official. It is in my OpenBC inbox sent with the ominous heading "Dear OpenBC moderator..."

I believe that all the discussions are healthy but - for goodness' sakes! Give it a rest. We hate the new name. They K-N-O-W. Whatever were you people thinking?! They K-N-O-W. This is a major marketing blunder. They K-N-O-W! They know, they know, they K-N-O-W.

Children, it is not just Lars and his OpenBC minions who know we hate the name and are questioning the state of their sanity when they did this. Even the Klingons know. How could they not? They heard our howls of rage all the way to the corner of Cassiopeia. Zeus himself has gone deaf from it. On the bright side, Xing might mean something powerful in Klingon gibberish.

But, like all break-ups, our 5 minutes to mourn the end of OpenBC the Brand Name is over.

OpenBC is now Xing. Xing is The Business Group Formerly Known As OpenBC. Any relation to The Artist Formerly Known As Prince?

How can u just leave me standing?
Alone in a world that's so cold?
Maybe I'm just too demanding
Maybe I'm just like my father too bold
Maybe you're just like my mother
She's never satisfied
Why do we scream at each other
This is what it sounds like
When doves cry

Seeing all those discussions, I got to thinking. Why is that?


I think it's an ego thing. God forbid you cannot have a say in what is obviously an important marketing matter. Because, then, what does that tell everyone else about your brains, business acumen and abilities? Oh please. We all have egos. I'm sure more than half of those who posted their replies to had their egos doing the thinking and posting for them. Mine certainly did after my first post where my violent reaction bared itself in verdana, font size 10.

You say it once, good. You repeat it, ok. Must you traumatize the whole world by repeating your point a third time? These are not idiots. So, yes, they all get the point. Your ego has just been taken for a walk in the park and admiring glances have been thrown its way. And, YES! We all saw the accompanying shiny newly-minted MBA from Some Prestigious Business School Out There.

Now, be good and do the world a favor. Return the ego home and feed it some ice cream.

Which is not to say that the points made were not valid. All of them were. But, really. In how many languages must you discuss branding to the point of reducing someone to a state of catatonia?

Which brings me to something else I noticed.

Most of the posts to the topic were done by men. Hold it! This is not gender-bashing. It was just something I noticed.

Is it because the female members of OpenBC were not interested in the topic? Is it because they couldn't care less because they have more important things to do like run their businesses or have a manicure? Is it because men are less shy about their opinions? Is it a macho thing?

I don't know but, if there's a shrink in the house, I'd sure like to get their opinion.

As for me - I don't know what went on inside OpenBC that made them swing this way. I am not one of the Powers That Be and, therefore, not privileged to see the whole picture. I can only offer an opinion as a marketing consultant but that opinion - while having merit - does not amount to much precisely because I am not privy to privileged information.

I have stated my marketing opinion. It maybe right. It maybe wrong. Who the hell cares? The important thing is that I said it. And now that I have said it, I am a happy bee moving on to the next object for pollination.

I still don't like the new name. I still think it makes me sound like a member of the Chinese Mafia or one of those trying hard Korean boy bands that raps. But what can I do, right?

Onwards and upwards. The King Is Dead. Long Live the King!

Photo shamelessly stolen from Molblog. Danke!

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Monday, September 25, 2006
Lady's Choice's Tina Tinapay

Advertainment has found its way into Philippine advertising. Of course, it has always been there but none as in-your-face perhaps as the ongoing advertising campaign of Lady's Choice via the series of Tina Tinapay mini-fantasy TVCs.

The target market, obviously, are the Filipino masses. Why? Honey, it is only they who can appreciate Tina Tinapay. No, it doesn't appeal to me but, then, I'm not the target market so what the heck? I don't eat Lady's Choice. Too tangy, too sour, too everything for me.

Riding on the success of her Encantadia character, Iza Calzado is a casting coup for this ad campaign. The hunky Alfred Vargas is a beautiful addition.

The campaign is unapologetically baduy. And that's good. Them marketing spooks behind this know who their target audience is and have come after them with their entire arsenal of weapons of mass destruction. The ads are joining the current fantasy craze bandwagon that is gripping the country.

Which makes me wonder now. Is it so bad here that we Filipinos have taken to escaping to Saladin? And very soon, the underwater world of Antartika?

The people behind this campaign have done their homework and done it very well. Now, if only everyone else can be as diligent as these people, we wouldn't be enduring crap during commercial breaks. We already get crap on TV. Must we get more from the ad campaigns?

No wonder I'm a Sabina-Argo freak.

Tina Tinapay continues here: Week 2, Week 3. My thanks to PrincessLilo of YouTube for the videos.

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Frenzy Condoms: Did I Just See That?!

I was watching TV the other night when I saw a TVC for Frenzy condoms. On primetime television.

Wow. The Philippines has certainly come a long way, baby.

Years ago, it would've been unthinkable for a condom commercial to air anywhere. The powerful Catholic Bishops Conference of the Philippines would've made sure of that. Trust me, the princes of the Roman Catholic Church here (of which 2 are found in my family) would've clamped down on them faster than the military could get to the NPAs. In this predominantly Roman Catholic country of mine, condoms and sex are never spoken of in polite society and who cares about AIDS or unplanned teenage pregnancies?

I remember a marketing campaign by Trust condoms before. I guess one can call it successful because, now, everyone is fully aware of the brand name, Trust. Still, it was a marketing campaign that was launched very tentatively. Lest hellfire and brimstone from the heavens fall on the unsuspecting marketing manager.

Enter Frenzy.


It was quite a nifty ad. Aimed at the young market (whose hormones are usually all over the place), it was tastefully executed. I actually thought they were advertising candy during the first few seconds. It only hit me after the TVC aired that it was an ad on condoms.

If I have any beef with the campaign, it stems from being a parent to a teenager and not as a marketing consultant.

The TVC's storyboard positioned the condoms rather quite casually - something that did not sit well with me as a mother although, as a marketing consultant, I get the point.

Had I been the one on board, I would've agreed to the positioning the product chose. After all, who gets in trouble frequently these days where sex is concerned? Of course, those with hormones all over the place and my own teenager (despite all the hemming and hawing) is going through the same thing. I am not so ancient that I cannot remember what it feels like to be a teen raised in a Catholic home and going to school in a strict Catholic prep school where repression is the norm.

So, yes, the ad is perfect where the marketing message targeted towards its market concerned.

As a mother, though, I have this thing about condoms being advertised oh so casually. Which is weird because I am the very same mother who bought condoms and a banana for her daughter when she asked me what they were. Needless to say, that little experiment has temporarily turned off all thoughts about sex for a while. Yippee! Well, wouldn't you feel disgusted when you see your mother trying to ram down a banana inside a condom and getting it all squishy? Really gross, I tell 'ya. I don't think I'll be having bananas anytime soon.

I just felt that it made the condoms too available for these kids. In my sane mind, I know I'd rather have the condoms available anywhere and everywhere than end up being a grandmother before I'm 45. Still, the Mommy in me is having violent reactions.

The Philippines is definitely changing where social norms are concerned. So much so that even marketing practices are changing as well. What was once taboo can now be discussed in living plasma screens albeit very gingerly. As a people, we still don't talk about sex and sexual orientation as openly as the rest of the world probably does but, the fact that we can now utter the words over iced latte without gagging, is a step in the right direction.

As a marketing consultant, that makes my job easier. I don't have to get a migraine just thinking of ways to get around a subject that would make my grandmother reach out to me from her grave. For, in how many ways can you position sex without having the fear of God placed in your dark heart, right?

I think it's time we get that subject out in the open so we teach our children what sexual responsibility is all about. We are not teaching them to be promiscuous. But, it helps when they know what they're getting themselves into and the consequences of their actions. In the hands of a sensitive marketing strategist, now would be a good time to start doing that.

Kudos to Frenzy for being a brave soul.

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Sunday, September 24, 2006
Xing?!

Surely, you jest.

Unfortunately, no. It really is the new name of
OpenBC. Xing.

"We have a lot more fun and interesting xings planned around XING..."

Powtah, ang baduy! I'm afraid I have no English translation for that phrase. Baduy is like tacky...pedestrian...rural...only something is lost in the translation.

Judging from that statement, Xing just tries too hard to be on the same alien spaceship as Google and Yahoo. The last two are cute albeit senseless while the former is just plain senseless. Googling? Cute. Yahoo? Very cute. Xing? Xinging? Ohgod.

All that marketing power on OpenBC and Xing was the best they could come up with. I gotta hand it to the geeks, then. Those argyle socks beat the crap out of some of the best marketing minds when it came to naming a brand. Methinks that we marketers can learn a lesson from them. That is, if we get past our egos.

I totally understand that a brand name has to be memorable. Xing is, of course, memorable. If you're thinking of seeing the Great Wall of China. Or, you're Genghis Khan's descendant. Attempting to ride a yak in Nepal. About to lay siege on Taipei 101. Ride a raft ala Tom Sawyer down the Mekong. Meet up with Lara Croft at the Angkor Wat. Shop till your calluses yell for help on Temple Street. Get a massage at Wat Pho.

Unfortunately, it does not connect to a business community especially one that aims to widen its international membership base. You know, international. Like the globe.


Xing tells me I need to see a plastic surgeon for some serious eye slanting to be able to register on OpenBC. And, after an agonizing failed attempt at registering myself on Facebook, do I really want to go in that direction? So difficult to be living in a third world country, I tell 'ya.

I agree. Business is fun. Business people, as shocking as it may sound, are fun. Xing, however, brings up a vision of a corporate suit on too much caffeine at 7am. You can be fun without having to take out a billboard sign declaring you're fun. Xing is one billboard sign that can be seen all the way to Pluto. It just tries too hard to be fun. Heck, it tries too hard. Period.

Of course, a brand name does not always have to capture the essence of a business or product. A brand name can build equity to the point of becoming an official verb, so says the people at Oxford Dictionary of googling.

Unfortunately, both my Magic 8 Ball and crystal ball tell me that it's not gonna happen to xing no matter how many marketing spooks you hold hostage in a conference room. Then, again, I have not yet checked my horoscope and fortune cookies so I could be wrong.

So, let's take xing out for a spin, shall we? After all, they did say that "interesting xings will soon be happening at Xing." *roll eyes until I'm cross-eyed*

I'll be xinging you at Xing. Yuck.
Hi, I'm new at Xing. Aching. Achoo. Bless you.
Can I xing you on my contact list? The cheesiest pick-up line on earth.
I'm a member of Xing. Bad boy, bad boy. Whatchagonna do when they come for you?
I'm on Xing. The cheaper version of Ecstasy.
I'm a Xing member. Oh, and so is Hannibal Lecter.
I'm inviting you to Xing. Wow. Ryan Seacrest is now a member.
Register at Xing. For the ultimate wedding gift.
Subscribe to Xing. And get the Trojan of your choice.


Maybe, it will help if a jingle goes with the new brand name.

Xing-a-ling-a-ling-ding-dong
Xing-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-ding-dong


Well, we won't be winning American Idol anytime soon with that jingle but, on the bright side, the jingle could be an interesting xing.

Why don't I just give the new name a chance? I could be wrong and it will work out wonderfully in the end. Because it wouldn't be me if I did not have an opinion.

Fine. Enough with the vitriolic reaction before I get kicked out of OpenBC. After this post, I would not be surprised if I am indeed kicked out. For being such an all-knowing biatch.

Maybe, xing - like exotic food - is an acquired taste. Gawd, I hope I acquire it soon. Otherwise, I might get xing'd.

Ang baduy talaga. Walang patawad sa kabaduyan.

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Saturday, September 23, 2006
Viral Marketing Gone Bad

This is why you should never buy fake Ecstasy. Ugh. Yuck. Gawdawful. Blech. Ewww. Then, again, I posted it everywhere so, in that, they have achieved their marketing objective.

I guess sometimes a monstrosity can be beautifully effective in all its hideousness.

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Friday, September 22, 2006
Those Legs

Michael Sloyan, Managing Director of
The British Business Club tells me: "Aha!... I have just visited your blog and, simple male creature that I am...the legs had my attention immediately!"

This is the nth time someone has remarked on those legs. Some days, it's good. Some days, it ain't good. I actually got in trouble once and those legs were used as an excuse for the flying cucumbers.

So, here's my explanation:

I think my best physical feature are my legs. Hold it! I don't say that to delude myself. People actually tell me it's my best asset.

My legs were discovered in 6th grade. As a reward for good behavior (yes, Catholic schools are really prisons with preppier uniforms), my class was allowed to go on a field trip to a secluded beach. When you're 11, you do not understand the concept of Coppertone and, therefore, it explains your failing grade in Science. I ended up with a bad case of sunburn with my legs getting the full brunt of it. For several weeks, it had a rosy glow earning me the nickname "Rosy Legs". Unfortunately, the glow soon gave way to blisters and peeling skin but the nickname prevailed. A child and several fine lines later, the nickname still remains along with other hideous ones which we will not go into.

I needed a graphic for my blog that would act as some sort of a logo because I didn't have one. I wanted the image to be memorable. My eureka moment for my graphic came when I slipped on the shower and got a huge purple bruise on my knee. That sent me scouring the Net for a graphic image that would go with the mental image in my mind.

Voila! The legs.

In short - when you think of sexy legs, you think of me and, therefore, my blog. Admittedly, not the best route to go when marketing one's self but hey! A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do to stand out in a crowd.

Sorry for destroying your illusions, Michael. :)

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Commercial Friendsters

Emergence Marketing pointed me to Sean Carton's article on social network marketing.

Honey, if you think that's cheesy, check this one out. Of course, I totally understand this is how the young think but, really, must you blind me?

This club's profile describes itself as: "Groove to the rhythms...hell yeah..wazzup! It's all good, man...it's all good. Keep it up!" People, we need to work on our copywriting skills, yes?

The most happenin' place in Manila's night life can be found at Embassy who, naturally, has several Friendster profiles. Among his 8 profiles, this one is most notable because his occupation is throwin' up a party. I'm guessing the lines to the toilet are verrry long. Although I have to admit the background photo is not as blinding as the first one.

Thankfully, my favorite coffee place, Segafredo, has a tolerable Friendster profile.

I wrote a post about this once. These establishments' marketing people have my sympathies. You work like a dog on that logo and your marketing strat. For your effort, you get all that.

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My Cup And A Lamborghini

For the record, I do not understand the point of this entire message or, if there's a point to it at all. Maybe, the marketing point is really to get people talking about it precisely because there is no point to the whole thing.

Ok, I'm confused with what I just said. Too many points there...The marketing point of this, however, is not my...er...point. The china is.

I have the same design on my china. So, now, I can claim to anyone who visits me at home - be careful with my china. Lamborghini used it in a campaign.


This is the original post. Photo credits by Coolzor.


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Wednesday, September 20, 2006
Marketing My Tsinelas

I cannot imagine anything more disgusting than opening your beer bottle with the bottom of your flip flops. Reef's Fanning Sandal is reportedly their top-selling shoe. God knows where that sandal has stepped on.

And what's with the flip flop craze? In the Philippines, flip flops are worn at home but they go by another name, tsinelas. Hmmm...flip flops is the term for the moneyed (hence, the proliferation of Havaiianas-shod feet in Boracay) while tsinelas is for us, the decidedly pedestrian. No matter what the price tag of your tsinelas are, Filipinos still have this thing about going around in their slippers. It is not cool to be walking around Greenbelt in your tsinelas a.k.a. Havaiianas or Islander. Long before the advent of flip flops, Filipinos already had their trusty Spartan.

Slowly, though, Filipinos are learning to bring their tsinelas out into the malls. Behold the power of marketing. It can change a culture.

I remember my Peace Corps friend, Scott, who would go everywhere in his slippers. Not only was I horrified, it took every ounce of my willpower not to cover his feet with a burlap sack. Note to Peace Corps: Teach your volunteers to use shoes in the Philippines and get a pedicure. I also remember this scene on Notting Hill where Julia Roberts shows up at Hugh Grant's shop (the scene with that uber-tacky dialogue: "I'm just a girl standing in front of a boy" blather). Nice outfit. Zoom in on feet. Ohgawd. T-S-I-N-E-L-A-S. Yak.

So, yes, it is gross to open my beer with my tsinelas.
My thanks to Brand Autopsy for this tidbit.

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Journalistic Meltdown

Yes, I confess. I regularly lurk on
Perez Hilton's blog. You don't? Gawd, you're missing a lot.

For instance, this hilariously cute freak out moment of a weatherman. This is exactly why Baygon insect repellant spray should be a part of any ensemble. For moments when cockroaches are at their most inconsiderate.

This video now reminds me of Michael Fajatin. This probably explains why he no longer has a career on GMA-7. He really should've studied under Professor David's Broad 130 class. A class where I learned not only the finer points of TV performance but sleeping on floors as well.

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Are You Indispensable?

No, you're not. Get over yourself.

Sometimes, when you're very good at what you do, you have a tendency to trip over your own ego. Such is the nature of humans. I am human. I occasionally trip over my own ego. I am sometimes guilty of believing my own press release.

It gets trickier to maneuver this when you frequently receive validation and confirmation of your abilities from your colleagues. Nothing feeds an ego more than to be stoked and stoked oh so wonderfully.

A recent conversation made my eyebrows go up. "No one can replace me." Ahhhh...
the captain of the Titanic pretty much said the same thing seconds after they hit that iceberg.

No one is indispensable. No one is that good that they are irreplaceable. I am sure that the next Bill Gates is just waiting to be discovered. He will be tanned, buffed and wearing contact lenses. The next Donald Trump will have a better hairstylist.

Or so says my crystal ball.

Everyone can be replaced. Hell, if a wife can be replaced, what makes you think an exec cannot be replaced? Jack Welch comes out with a new wife for each new book so what is your point? The corporate world is littered by the bodies of CEOs far more accomplished than this 27-year-old executive. May their souls rest in peace. If Donald Trump can fire Carolyn Kepcher, what makes you think you are indispensable and irreplaceable? Who are you again?

Oh, to be 27 and believe that the world is your playground. All the world's a stage, Shakespeare said. And all the players have understudies.

"Seriously, no one can replace me. It will be difficult to do so with this kind of company." Is your company GE? No, it is not. Neutron Jack found Jeff Immelt. Your chairman can do the same thing if he moved his lazy behind. That's what headhunters are for. So, seriously, you can be replaced.

The key phrase there is "difficult to replace." To which, I will agree which is why most execs have a resignation clause on their contracts. Mine stipulated that I have to file my resignation 3 months before it can actually take effect. That should provide the company enough time to find a senior exec that will fill my position the moment I decide to take a hike. If I choose not to follow the 3 months, either I or my new company will have to buy out my contract. Not good because I have more important things to spend my money on. For instance, my website and all the Red Vanilla Bags my greedy hands can get on. Not to mention, Citibank bills.

I am very good at what I do but, no, I am not indispensable nor am I irreplaceable. My ego may not like that but, then again, my ego does not like many things. I may know a lot about marketing but someone knows more than I do. Someone is always better than me and my ex-boyfriends have gone to great lengths to point that out.

I am, however, difficult to replace. My clients need time to find my replacement if I choose not to renew my contracts with them. It will slow them down a little but it will not maim them and my loss will definitely not kill them. Why? Because the next hungry marketing consultant is just waiting for me to turn my back and pounce on my turf. Welcome to corporate Africa.

It is one thing to be confident, quite another to be arrogant. The arrogant die a very unglamorous death. Usually, they are devoured by sharks. Ouch. Or, they end up in jail. Hello, Enron.

For one to start taking this "I am indispensable" route, it can have tragic repercussions on your career. It makes you complacent. It does not fuel the fire to learn more and better yourself at what you do. Because why should you? You are, after all, indispensable and irreplaceable and aren't they usually gods on Mount Olympus? But, even gods die and often by an arrow on their ankles.

Believing you are indispensable is a short ride to believing you are invincible. You're not because you are just as human as the rest of us. Therefore, flawed.

It is when you begin to believe you're so good that you start making mistakes. You don't often see these mistakes because, again, why should you? The good do not make mistakes. They are only momentarily distracted which is how Samson lost all his hair at a time when skinhead was not yet a punk fashion statement.

Lessons in humility are not always pleasant, more so for executives who feel that immortality is just a memo and a signature away. I hate humility lessons. They usually cause sleepless nights and a depletion of my tea bags. But, like your PDA and mobile, these are must-haves in today's corporate world. Not to mention, life in general.

It is very good to be aware of your talents, skills and abilities. But, it is better to be grounded. Not only do you earn the respect of your colleagues but you get better exec packages.

After all, who wants to work with someone who believes God invented the sunrise for his sole benefit?

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Monday, September 18, 2006
ADVISORY:

My PC under repair right now. Trojan zapped it. So, if I am unable to reply to your messages, it's probably because I have not gotten to an internet cafe or a Wi-Fi hotspot. Currently, I'm just using someone else's computer on a turtle internet connection.

So, nope. Didn't fall off the planet. Just cut off from the human race for now. Again. I'm aiming to return to Planet Earth by Tuesday. *Fingers crossed*

For your info.

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Saturday, September 16, 2006
Military Marketing

All these discussions on the use of
MySpace as a business networking tool has me digging through my Feedreader for anything MySpace.

Do you know that the US Air Force has its own MySpace?

With close to 98 million registered users, MySpace.com is an ideal venue for the Air Force to connect with potential recruits and promote awareness for its up-and-coming documentary-style ad campaign "Do Something Amazing."

See those magic words - ad campaign? Needless to say, the US Air Force has some serious marketing talent on their roster. Either that or they hired a really good advertising & PR agency.

I cannot say the same for our own Philippine military whose claim to fame as far as online presence goes can be attributed largely to Capt. Faeldon's infamous site.

There is a difference between a military and marketing strategist no matter what Sun Tzu says. Not all men skilled in military tactics can claim that they are just as skilled with marketing strategies. Or, vice versa. Faeldon's failed attempt at rallying the public and his military brothers to his cause is an obvious example.

That and the fact that his wife called him Nicky on live national television.

But, then, again - what do you expect from a group of military officers whose idea of a coup d'etat is to capture a 5-star hotel? You know you're in a surreal universe when a coup d'etat is launched with a butler on hand.

The Philippines' premier military academy, the Philippine Military Academy, produces upstanding military officers that hold true in their hearts their academy's motto - courage, integrity and loyalty. Well, of course, loyalty here refers to country only and does not include marriages/long-term relationships.

But, I believe they need to hire marketing talent ala US Air Force. These people have no concept of the art of branding. Just the art of warfare and look where it's gotten them.

Welcome to the PMA's official website. Zzzzzzz.

"That is why we want to attract and select only the best, PMA authorities added." Apparently, the best includes a suspected member of the communist rebels who suddenly disappeared from the academy recently.

Ugh. Those photos have got to go. Will someone please hire a commercial photographer to do the shoot?

Unlike the US Air Force, the PMA or any branch of the Philippine military for that matter, does not have an official Friendster or MySpace account. There are, however, some unofficial PMA Friendster accounts.

At the top of that list is this Friendster profile.

Someone should teach this boy website readability. If the aim here is to attract potential recruits, it is probably best to warn them of impending eyestrain.

Favorite books include anything about strategy and tactics. Marketing for Dummies is a good start. Listed on Friendster PMA's favorite TV shows are Extreme Machines, Soldier of Fortune, Lock n' Load, - WHOA! Smallville?

As with everything else in business, the military needs to employ marketing strategies on military schools in order to attract the best of the best. Young men and women who will serve their country to the best of their abilities. Souls who are willing to give up their lives without question in order to defend God and country.

And, yes, the military is a business. It has far loftier ideals than those of your average corporation but make no mistake. It is a business owned and ran by the government that has sovereignty over it.


Whether its distinguished alumni agree or not, the PMA is a brand. Being a PMA-er is a brand. And, right now, that brand failed to evolve. It is stuck in the 1900s and, the last time I looked, we are now in the year of our Lord, 2006.

The PMA - and branches of the Philippine military - should come up with a marketing campaign that will spiff up its image. This way, they get the kind of recruits they are really aiming for.

"In order to reach young men and women today, we need to be in tune and engaged in their circles," said Col. Brian Madtes, Air Force Recruiting Service's Strategic Communications director. "MySpace.com is a great way to get the word out to the public about the amazing things people are doing in the Air Force."

The Philippine military should consider pirating the good colonel.

Perhaps, if the PMA took its cue from the US Air Force, the harvests for future military officers will be of better quality instead of just military officers who can quarter turn with the best of the Bb. Pilipinas candidates.

I'm not saying that the US Air Force MySpace strategy will work for us. I'm saying these people did their homework. They studied their product vis-a-vis their potential target market and went after it with guns blazing.

Sun Tzu said in his Art of War, "One who knows the enemy and knows himself will not be endangered in a hundred engagements. One who does not know the enemy but knows himself will sometimes be victorious, sometimes meet with defeat. One who knows neither the enemy nor himself will invariably be defeated in every engagement."

Translation?

Know your product. Know your target market. Know your competitor.

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 12:29 AM
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. . .
Friday, September 15, 2006
Lookin' For Love

I discovered
Google Trends Labs from Sandy Riedel. According to Sandy's post, this is the "ultimate in coolness in reviewing world’s search patterns and trends by customer’s geographical location." (Isn't Sandy so pretty?)

I go on the link and, just for the heck of it, I search for "love." The results make me laugh.

The Philippines ranks #1. Singapore is a very far #2 while Australia is a rather distant #3 from the PI. On Languages, Tagalog rules it when it comes to lookin' for love. English is #2 but it is not even half of Tagalog. Swedish is #3, almost half of those English-speaking people surfing the Net for Eros.

I hate to think what that says about my countrymen.

I have to admit, though, that the internet has truly changed the face of dating and it's not just in the Philippines. I've never tried visiting personals site although, for the sake of marketing (hah!), I probably should.

Paul recommended I visit Match.com. After much thinking (I don't know why I even had to think about it when no one will see me visiting the site anyway), I finally did. Wow. So many people looking for Cupid. Maybe an APB should be sent out for him?

Then, there are those online places that are not blatantly marketed as a meat market site but gets around to being one. They come under the quaint heading social networks. Of course, most are really legit social networks whose members are not driven there to search for Eros. Some social networking sites are actually good for developing business contacts. Yes, even MySpace and Friendster.

It really depends on how you "market" yourself through your profile. If you post a photo of yourself with your cleavage popping out from everyone else's monitors, my guess is that you're not there to find business contacts. Then again, I - with the Israeli actor photo on my profiles - could be wrong.

Have you tried to sign up for an account with one of these sites? Immense pressure, I tell 'ya.

First, there is the issue of photos. The aim is always to be cool, sophisticated, glamorous and cosmopolitan. Hence, all these photos with such original captions:


"Dancing - London, UK"
"Feeding the pigeons, Piazza San Marco"
"With walruses, Galapagos Island"
"Coffee shop, Paris"


It's very Around The World In 80 Days. I am tempted to take out my Atlas, download an exotic locale photo (Namibia sounds good now that I know Namibia exists, thanks to Brangelina) and Adobe Photoshop CS myself on it. Personally, I find it to be pretentious sh*t. Or, I could just be green with envy because I've never been to Galapagos Island and that's on my list of Places To See Before I Croak.

Imagine the stress of scouring all your photo albums for your travel pictures. Photo albums - being photo albums - are covered in dust. On top of the stress, you now have allergies. Hello, antihistamine.

I chose the healthier alternative. I uploaded a photo of my bathroom with my loofah taking center stage. Thank you, Icy. But, then, people thought I was dysfunctional (I really am, of course, but that's not the topic we're discussing here) so, to correct that, I uploaded My Sheikh. Now, everyone just thinks I had a sex change operation.

And, then, there is The Profile.

God forbid that you do not list down the latest hit from Justin Timberlake. ANCIENT! In the Favorite Book section, one must be quite the literati, of course. Tolstoy! Bullsh*t. Who actually enjoys Tolstoy for light reading? Favorite Movie. Either you list the latest box office hit or the ones that Cannes and Sundance picked as their top choices for the year. And who cares that it's in French with no subtitles? You are cool, artistic and intense. Of course, there is the Favorite Quote and I would really recommend you visit Brainy Quotes. Enormous amount of material there.

The piece de resistance is All About Me.

"People would say that I am a bit crazy." So says on Tasha's MySpace who likes pie but prefers a meat sandwich.

Men like simple women which led me once to ask petulantly - WHO THE HELL IS SIMPLE?! Because, really, I'd like to meet her. TADAHN! She's got MySpace. "I am simple." Well, I'm glad someone finally admitted to being Simple and did not lead me to continue thinking I'm merely being psychotic.

From a female DJ in Chico, Cali. "I’m looking for a distraction that keeps my attention." Oh. Naturally, when one is in media, one must have something very...copywriter...written down. I am in media and doncha forget it.

My favorite is Kiko's. "Born free to live, love hard, play hard and pray to the God in heaven. Free to laugh at least once a day to stimulate my arteries. For time is what I spend, what I dispense so freely that eventually all that is left is Eternity. Somebody is born, somebody dies, somebody marries...that's immortality!" Kiko is retired and, naturally, I had to connect to him. After all, how many retired people do I know with a Friendster account and is not afraid to say? Hi, Kiko!

Oscar Wilde (and I am not sh*tting you when I say his quotes are my favorite) says, "Only the shallow know themselves." I am not shallow. I do not know myself. Which explains the endless dramatic moments in my life.

Sign up on Friendster and MySpace. After all, you never know who you will meet there. Dean says most "boring" professionals might not have MySpace. I am not boring. I have MySpace. And, very soon, Facebook.

Jenny from MySpace says, "I rock the world." With such an ominous statement, I have to connect to her. The better to predict seismic tremors.

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 5:03 PM
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. . .
Thursday, September 14, 2006
A Silly Giggle

This was rather funny so I thought I'd post it here as well. Get baaaaccckkkk, men! This is not male bashing. Get baaaaccck!

-----------
WHO DOES WHAT

A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.

The wife said, "You should do it because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."

The husband said, "You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."

Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."

Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me."

So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says ........... "HEBREWS"

----------
My thanks to
Sue Sedam for the original post. Smiles to Nicole Simon who thought it was funny as well.

Okaaay. So, maybe, there's a wee bit of male bashing there. Down with the bows and arrows, boys. Please.

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 11:39 PM
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. . .
My Meralco Suggestions

I've given up trying to understand the Comments section of my blog and why it refuses to upload the messages. I get them on my email, though.

So. I get this one today about
my Meralco post.

Being a marketing consultant, what can you suggest to Meralco then? Posted by Anonymous to Confessions Of A Marketing Addict at 9/14/2006 03:44:14 PM

I liked the question and, as it so happens, I've been mulling about it since I posted that.

See, the thing is that - when I receive my Meralco bill, I don't understand anything it says other than the part that screams in very bold font: TOTAL CURRENT AMOUNT.

Years ago, it was the PPA (EPA? APA? Something like that.) that was causing the bill to balloon. Then, it got scrapped and, for a while, jubilation. Not so fast. It just took on another form. I'm looking at it and what in the world is a Lifeline Rate? The only lifeline I know is the one on those heart monitors that tell your loved ones if you're dead or alive. Under Value Added Tax, there is System Loss Charge. What system loss charge? I am losing something when my power fluctuates so shouldn't I be charging Meralco this System Loss Charge instead?

Which brings me to my point.


The public do not understand their electric bill. Hence, all that animosity, anger and hostility towards Meralco. I'm sure Meralco has a valid reason for all those charges but, unless explained in a way that Manang Norma will understand, the animosity will remain.

Scrap the mall tour. Scrap that Price Is Light game show. Instead, go to where your consumers are and explain it to them. You know, people fear that which they do not understand. They will either cower in fright or lash out. The latter seems to be the choice that the Filipino public has opted for.

Why can't you conduct free seminars to the barangays? Bring an entire plasma screen to some basketball court in Purok 12, Sitio 6 and conduct an awareness campaign that does not talk down to them. A campaign that respects their dignity and intelligence. Send people who can speak their language. Have these people explain exactly what goes on to make their bill look like this. Listen to their stories and do something about it.


If you have the time to read this blog, I'm sure you can make time for the public who are more important than I am and are not remotely interested in my blog.

It wouldn't hurt to provide them with free merienda (snacks) as well and please! None of those Pan De Sal sandwiches and Zest-O. They may come for the merienda but, at least, they came and listened.

Train your people to be more sensitive when they take meter readings. Teach them what customer service is all about. Even the guards at the Meralco office where I pay are so arrogant. They forget that it is we, the paying public, who make it possible for them to have jobs.

I like that machine you have that measures electrical consumption for each appliance. Why don't you bring that with you when you go to the barangays and let them try it out? Explain to them the whys and whats of their refrigerator's consumption of electricity. It is way better than handing out those flyers that I often find inside my bill. Those flyers are useless. No one reads them because they've gone blind from the shock of seeing their electric bill.

Your website is a wonderful thing. I can actually track my bill in it. But, that's me and I don't represent the enormous percentage of the Filipino masses. They do not have access to a computer much less the internet. I'm sure some of them still get petrified at the idea of booting a computer. If you can take what's inside that website to the public, it would do a lot to make them understand what's happening to their bill. Right now, they're just wondering if Casper has gotten to their cables which explain their skyrocketing bills.

That mall tour is just a Band-Aid. It will take their minds off their electric bill for awhile but, as soon as the delight of seeing Rica Peralejo wears off, they will remember it again and hate you twice as much. For fooling them and wasting money that Meralco could've used to pay off its bad debts.


On your website, your latest news says that there will be reductions in electric bills. I didn't know that and neither did my neighbors. The entry was dated August 17. Did that reduction take effect already? Was it on my bill? Perhaps it was in that mind-boggling System Loss Charge? These are things that should've been communicated to the consumer because it will help a lot in uplifting Meralco's sagging image.

And what is this Customer Choice Program? Is this like a Daylight Savings thing? It would've been nice to explain that further to the business community as a way of informing them that there are alternatives they can utilize in order to control their electric consumption.

Instead of taking all that budget for some useless mall tour and game show, use it for a more effective and efficient awareness campaign. The Filipino masses barely have enough to keep body and soul together. And you want them to spend what little they have left on transportation fare to go watch a mall show that does nothing to alleviate their sorry plight except give them temporary amnesia?

Everyone needs electricity. Whether I like it or not, Meralco and I are destined to be together for life. So, like any Catholic marriage gone bad where annulment is not an option, I prefer to co-exist with Meralco in the most harmonious way I can find.

I only ask that the company do not treat me and the rest of the public like dimwits. That mall tour and game show insults my intelligence and runs roughshod over my dignity. I am not alone in that sentiment, I assure you.

And stop it with the power fluctuations! For the amount I shell out each month on my electric bill, I deserve better service.

P.S. I don't just bitch over something without thinking of options to address the problem. Sometimes, the option I think of won't work. But, at least, I have options. Way better than just bitching for the sake of bitching which is a totally un-productive exercise.

Anonymous, I love your question. Thank you for asking it. Now, come out of hiding. I am not going to synch the Abu Sayyaf on you. LOL.

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 4:33 PM
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. . .
What Was That?

I'm not happy with the new promotional video of the
Department of Tourism, Byahe Tayo.

It featured several artists singing a rather nice song. Actually, I like the song. It's the video I'm having a problem with. It gave more emphasis to the artists rather than the Philippines. FYI, We Are The World is so dated and Michael Jackson now lives in Bahrain.

I realize that this is an x-deal but, really, must Sharon Cuneta overpower the magnificence of the Chocolate Hills? Do I really need to see Janno Gibbs' nose at 800 pixels compared to the pristine beauty of our beaches? If you want to help promote Philippine tourism, train your ego to not compete with size of the butanding (whale shark) in Sorsogon.

I loved the old TVCs of the DOT especially those Wow Philippines series. The Wow Philippines campaign was really good. I think that was done during Dick Gordon's time. I'm not sure now. I have vague memories of Gordon explaining what Wow in Wow Philippines meant. Wild Over Water. Watch Our Whales. Therefore, Wow Philippines. I also loved their tagline, More Than The Usual.

David Guerrero's BBDO/Guerrero created the campaign's TVCs. The TVCs were all brilliantly conceptualized and beautifully-executed. So beautiful, it brought tears to my eyes and made me want to play the National Anthem. Seriously. Then again, it's Dave Guerrero and his creative reputation precedes him.

Last summer's Biyahe Na campaign with Regine Velasquez was also good. Smart, Jollibee and other local corporations partnered with DOT for it. They had these tarpaulin streamers lining Roxas Blvd. leading up to the NAIA. Simple in design yet very striking. The TVCs were also good except I didn't care much for Regine in that swimsuit.

On YouTube, I discovered that E! featured the Philippines on one of its Wild On series with Brooke Burke. Predictably, they featured Manila and Boracay. I hated it.

The most important part of the Philippines are not the women, you jacka*s of a scriptwriter. One guy being interviewed said, "Women of all ages are here. Anyone you want is here." Thank you for such a sterling endorsement. Welcome, pedophiles and perverts. They could've just focused on the party scene which was really what E!'s Wild On is all about.

Another video I found was the Philippine Tourism AVP. I liked the way the video was executed. The only thing that was irksome there was the emphasis on Filipinas and scantily-clad at that. For goodness' sakes, we all know what the world thinks of Filipinas. Shouldn't our goal be to correct that sordid opinion? I assure you that an underwater shot of a woman in a string bikini will not get us there.

Perhaps, the DOT should consider hiring a marketing expert who specializes in nation branding. The Philippines has so much to offer and none of them have anything to do with Filipinas.

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 1:55 AM
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. . .
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Philips Lumalive

This is soooo cute. I want, I want, I want. I need to find a client who has enough marketing budget to afford the
Philips Lumalive fabric.

And when I do, naturally I will steal one. I would not be a marketer if I didn't know how to steal. LOL.


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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 2:25 AM
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. . .
Monday, September 11, 2006
Let There Be Light

Meralco, the Philippines' largest power provider, launched a quaint PR campaign - The Price Is Light.

According to their PR fluff, The Price Is Light is "an entertaining and unique game show that aims to answer the public's questions about Meralco's services." Desperation knows no bounds and the Lopez behemoth is obviously not above it all. Tacky does not begin to describe this. Is their PR agency so devoid of any creative analytical ability that they have to reduce the public's plight to a game show?! This is what we get for importing the Deal or No Deal franchise hosted by the equally tacky Kris Aquino. But, why be surprised? Deal or No Deal is on ABS-CBN, another Lopez behemoth that is slowly bleeding like a pig.

People, the public have very real and serious concerns about their steadily increasing Meralco bill whose aim seems to be the blissful state of poverty for all Filipinos. Don't you think they deserve a better way of having things explained to them without insulting their intelligence and dignity?

A game show. That's the best that you can do? Fire your PR agency, for the love of God.

"The event will also feature several ABS-CBN stars as participants and will tour different SM malls." You know you have a serious corporate image problem when you are a power company doing a mall tour.

This is my favorite: "The public can play with their favorite celebrity and win prizes courtesy of Meralco." Hopefully, the prize is waiving your disconnection notice for this month. This is carnival mentality at its lowest.

The other day, Meralco sent out its army of juvenile interviewers to conduct a survey.

3 of these lost souls landed on my doorstep at 10-minute intervals. Didn't they teach you children how to conduct a survey? Rule #1, don't harass respondents especially those with sick children and very noisy dogs. Meralco has an enormous budget to do this but, apparently, that does not extend to hiring well-trained interviewers.

And so I find one screaming her question over the howling of my dogs, "MA'AM, TUMAAS PO BA ANG MERALCO BILL NINYO?!" (Ma'am, did your Meralco bill increase?) What kind of asinine survey question is that? I took pity on her, though. She's a teenage kid. What does she know? She's probably doing this to earn money for more cell phone load.

I told her yes, it increased. She looks at her notes and screams again. "BAKIT PO?" (Why?) At which point, my dogs bark more furiously. See, even the dogs cannot believe the stupidity of their questionnaires. Don't these people know? A UAI does not encourage open-ended questions. Especially not to respondents with very sick children and angry dogs. How many times must I emphasize that for this kid to get the point? GO. AWAY.

She doesn't. Even when I turn my back to go inside, she doesn't get it. Either she's extremely stupid or they have her on morphine. "MA'AM, MAKAKATULONG PO ITO SA MERALCO PARA PAGANDAHIN ANG SERBISYO NILA SA INYO." (Ma'am, this survey will help Meralco improve their services.)

They definitely have her on morphine.


The only thing that Meralco will get from that idiot survey is the validation that the public thinks they're full of sh*t. The only benefit to them is for the marketing spooks to go through the survey results (assuming it has not been manipulated by lazy tabulators) and figure out the best way for Meralco to regain public goodwill. When they've done that, they will hire an expensive but worthless PR agency who will recommend game shows and mall tours as a way of appeasing an angry public.

But, that survey, I assure you, will never ever be used by Meralco as a way to improve their services. If they were really sincere about it, these damn power fluctuations will not be happening. Why? Because my neighbors and I complained about it on last year's survey as did half of the friggin' city. And still, the fluctuations happen. My PC now has a love-hate relationship with my UPS.

A year and a half ago, some Meralco teller giddily informs me that they will no longer be putting my electric bill inside envelopes. Why? Cost-cutting, ma'am. To which I, the idiot consumer, assumed this wonderful thing must have some benefit to me. "Manong, e di bababa po ang kuryente ko kasi nakatipid kayo ng ilang milyon sa envelope lang?" (Sir, does this mean my electric bill will lower because, after all, you've saved millions by ditching the envelopes?) He looked at me as if I suddenly morphed into the spawn of Satan. "Ay, hindi. Para lang sa kumpanya 'to." (No, only the company will benefit.)

Oh.

At least, Greenpeace will be happy that Meralco is doing its best to contribute to the preservation of the world's forests. Why didn't they just shut up about the envelope? No one notices the envelope that comes with their electric bill. They only notice the bill. Period.

The Price Is Light, by the way, is not the best title Meralco can use to counteract hostile public opinion. In the hands of a twisted marketer, that can actually mean something more horrible other than just a play of words on Bob Barker's game show. Think about it deeply. Isn't that just a tad bitchy for a title?

Then again, they're playing to the perya mentality of the Filipino masses who can forgive any transgression as long as Piolo Pascual sings. Or, rather, bleats.

No wonder we get crap from companies like Meralco.

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 3:50 PM
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. . .
Complain and Perish

Smart Communications, Inc. recently launched their latest offering to enhance their customer service,
Sagot Agad Text Service. The deal is that you can just text in (I'm sorry, Webster, but text is now a verb in this fair land of mine) your questions and Smart will immediately send you a reply. Hence, Sagot Agad (Reply Immediately).

The main menu consists of 7 categories from A to G. 7. I kid you not. I can't imagine anything more irritating than downloading 7 categories on a screen no bigger than 3 fingers. These people have no fear of eyestrain or thumb sprain for that matter.

Here's the kicker. You are charged P2.50 for each complete transaction. W-H-Y?! Shouldn't customer service be free? I'm asking you about your latest promo and I have to pay for that question?! Shouldn't you just be glad that someone is interested enough to ask about it? Imagine if no one did. Goodbye, marketing career. Hello, Citibank debts.

Regular SMS messages cost P1.00/message. But, an inquiry as to why there is no network signal will set you back by P2.50. Something is very wrong with this picture. It isn't the subscriber's fault there's no signal in his area. It's yours. So, why should he pay for your ineptitude? It's bad enough he's paying for lousy service, must you aggravate the situation by making him pay for an inquiry into that lousy service?

The Philippines is reputedly the world's SMS capital. When I see people hitting poles and being run over by speeding buses because they're texting (I told you it's now a verb) while walking, I'm inclined to believe that. No signal means no texting. No texting = Armageddon. The end of mankind.

Therefore, Smart's attempt to beef up their customer service is truly commendable. But, it would be more commendable if they can drop that P2.50/message charge. I'm guessing this is Smart's roundabout way of discouraging people to text their concerns while still under the guise of prioritizing the subscriber's interests. We care but not enough to waste valuable cell site resources on you.

Smart says that this is "more convenient. They no longer have to go to our Wireless Centers for simple concerns. This way, our customers save time and money." How?! It takes several minutes to compose a simple text and at great cost to your spelling talents. If your complaint consists of 3 linked messages, that's roughly P7.50 per complaint. What if you don't get a reply immediately? After all, the Filipino's definition of immediately takes on a time concept that is unique to the rest of the world. So, then, you must re-send your message until forever effectively depleting your cell phone load.

The new service also allows users to cancel their subscriptions to a specific download or service. This is a joke. I once had a Smart phone. Angel used it to subscribe to their ringtones. I tried to cancel the service. The machine said it's cancelled. But, until the day some snatcher grabbed it from me, it never cancelled. On the bright side, I hope the darned service depletes the cell phone load of that thief.

Maybe, Smart's customer service agents have gone deaf from all the cursing they get from irate subscribers. Maybe, they're cost cutting? Cut the number of customer service agents by half and replace them with a machine. Yippee! No more SSS, 13th month pay and medical coverage.

As for me, I prefer talking to a live person. Nothing is more satisfying and releasing than venting your rage on a living, breathing representative of a company. A machine takes all the fun out of cursing, donchatink?

Continue reading this...

Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 1:47 PM
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. . .
Friday, September 08, 2006
That Fateful Night

I remember only the fear. My fear.

It was 9pm in the Philippines, then. I had just gotten home from work. I was still in the corporate world, not doing consultancy. I staggered home to find Angel asleep. My mom had called me at work but I was stuck in a meeting so I couldn't take her call.

After tossing my shoes to somewhere within the box I once called my apartment, I sat down with my coffee with the requisite nicotine stick in one hand to watch TV. And there it was.

The US was a victim of a massive and horrible terrorist attack.

While I was at work dealing with the million and one things that came with running a marketing department, the country my mother called home for more than 30 years was under siege. I saw the World Trade Center going up in flames. People running for their lives. People falling off buildings. Death and chaos everywhere. The giant that was the United States was being brought down to its knees in living CNN color.

And, then, it hit me.


My mother was in New York visiting my aunt who lived there. I grabbed my phone and called our house in NJ. Answering machine. I called Ancora, the hospital where my mother works as one of their head doctors. The hospital operator pages for her but she does not answer.

16,000 nautical miles and a 23-hour plane ride away, I am gripped by terror.

What if my mom was one of those victims? My fear shuts down all coherent thought. I find myself hitting my walls as I try to find my way to my kitchen. Why don't I ever keep a bottle of vodka at home? Cupboards bang as I desperately try to find something that will return my sanity. Angel wakes up amidst all the ruckus and wondering why I am so pale. Her nanny wakes up as well. Both do not understand why I am in this dazed and confused state. I try to explain but my tongue has a mind of its own. The stupid organ refuses to cooperate with me and has lodged itself permanently in my esophagus.

The nanny, realizing that her mistress has temporarily lost her mind, carts off her charge to her own room where there is sanctuary from my temporary madness. I remember going outside to smoke in order to clear my head. My dog barks and I scream at the offending beast. My next door neighbor wisely shut off her lights. She's probably thinking it's one of those nights again.

No, this is not one of those nights. This is a very bad night and I want my mother on the phone. NOW. G*ddamn*t! If someone has to kill my mother, it will be me. Not some terrorist in desperate need of a shave and a better wardrobe selection.

I finally fell asleep on my couch, suit and all. I cradled both my mobile and landline so I can immediately pick up any calls. Occasionally, the phones would ring but it's just my office. We were preparing our presentation for budget negotiations so, predictably, my life has to stop. At 1am, the phone rings. If this is my assistant again, I will fire his sorry ass tomorrow.

It's my mom. I have no words to describe my relief at that moment. It was orgasmic. This must be what sex is all about, my insane mind thinks. The line is bad. I can barely hear her over the static. It does not matter. What matters is she is alive and I am able to tell her all the sappy things children (no matter what age) should tell their parents.

Today, the world remembers the horror that was 9/11. Today, the world honors the heroes of that tragic day. But, for me, today is the day I am reminded of my mother's worth.

I love you, Mommy.


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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 10:57 PM
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. . .
Friday, September 01, 2006
Out on business trip starting tomorrow. Gone for a week. Nope, not purposely ignoring emails. I will try to reply immediately but, if I don't, that's why.

ttfn, S.

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 2:41 AM
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. . .
What Am I Saying?

Niel asked me a question: What is the purpose of this blog? What message am I trying to convey?

None.

How's that for a marketing answer from a marketer who should know better?! But, seriously, there is no underlying message that should serve some instant benefit to my career.

This blog was never intended to gain clients. I started this blog as an offshoot of my personal blog which I have now kept locked. Isn't a password a thing of beauty? Other women get flowers, love letters and diamonds. I get stalkers. I am truly unique.

I wanted a place where I could write down my thoughts not only about marketing but the things that happen in my professional life as well. I figured if I have such a place, I can put some sort of distance between me and my professional life. That distance (no matter how small and hypothetical) could at least give me a chance to see whether I'm progressing or I'm having another one of my infamous
Lost moments.

No one knew this blog existed until a few months ago when I started attaching the URL to my work email. I thought about it for a long time. Some days, it's on my email. Other days, I remove it. Depends who I'm sending out my email to. Sometimes, I like the idea of people reading my thoughts on marketing. Other times, I don't. I'm very flaky about this blog.

A few months ago, I decided to attach it permanently to my email and signature on business networks I belong to. Though I still get the urge to scratch it off, I stick to that decision. It's healthy for me - professionally. I get to see how far or near my thoughts are from everyone else in the same profession as I am. Sometimes, people disagree with me and that's ok. Because it forces me to revisit my thoughts and view it from another perspective. Others agree and it's good for my self-esteem because it validates me as a marketing professional.

The only downside is that I now have to censor some of thoughts in consideration of those who read this blog. I can't just write everything down because God forbid a client of mine googles (Microsoft, google is now officially a verb. Remove that offending red underline, please) for me, lands here and, then, where will I be? Will sing for food. Ewww.

I also cannot write stuff in the way I want to write it because I will have to translate often and that's just boring. Besides, a lot will be lost in translation especially if I resort to gay lingo which I often use.

That's why, unlike most marketing blogs, this one does not have so many How-To, Marketing Tips or any of the usual stuff you expect and normally find on a marketing blog. Everything is written in the first person. Me. Everything is related to an experience or thought that I had. Yes, I cannibalize my professional life for my blog posts.

Hardly any of my clients or business associates knows this blog exists. Even my friends and family don't know. Or, at least, that's what I like to tell myself. For them, I have a separate blog. I maintain so many blogs for different sets of people, I'm so confused now where I am on the internet. There I am calling people (who do not know I exist) that they are confused brands. Yet, lo and behold! I am one myself.


And how would I feel if clients have indeed found this blog? Sir, I did not write down your company name, I swear.

Naturally, whether I want it or not, this blog conveys a message of some sort. It is a communication material, therefore, it communicates something. The question is: Is it the kind of message I want to communicate? Which brings me back to: What is it communicating?

I have no clue.

Personally, I hope for so many things where this blog is concerned. That it is interesting and, maybe, informative. That it helps you process your thoughts the way it helps me process mine as I write it. That it is insightful. And while I know this is so hokey, I hope it makes you smile at the end of a very loooong day.

Do I want this blog to communicate my intelligence and expertise as a marketer? I think that's a given. But, no. That was never the obvious intention either. It is more of a result of the way I write and what I write about.

If there's one thing that I would really want this blog to communicate or even showcase, it's the fact that I can write and a damn good writer at that. I dream of a Pulitzer. I dream it so much, I actually have an acceptance speech all written down. Hey, dreams are free. It is not against the Geneva Convention or the Philippine Constitution to dream big, you know.

Calling all literary agents. Discover me, please.

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 1:22 AM
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. . .
My apologies to Mitch and Tery for not uploading their comments immediately. The thing doesn't want to work. &#$@##&^!! Or, maybe, it's me? Technology has this way of going against me most of the time. Sigh.

Tery: Thank you so much for such a nice comment. So sorry again about the blog name. I swear I didn't know. :)

Mitch: This is late but thank you for your understanding and support over that little matter. It helped that some men understood.

Bob: Your comment is somewhere here. I told the thing to upload it. For some strange reason, it refuses to obey me. It is the story of my life. LOL. Yes, I agree with you. Customer is the most important title of all. Now, if only I can find that comment and upload it.

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Marketing Confessions of Sunny whispered 12:05 AM
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. . .


Sunny S. Cervantes,
The Marketing Girl

The Marketing Girl

...

Read My Confessions

This marketing consultant
feeds her writing
frustrations by
churning out
voluminous
marketing plans.

Welcome to my world!


...

This Month's Nice Words

O-F C-O-U-R-S-E,
I bribed them.

Seriously, though,
MANY THANKS for the
privilege of working
with all of you and
the honor of being
considered your friend.


...

"Sunny is a pleasure
to work with.
She takes a practical
approach to business
problems and is very
precise and accurate
in explaining situations.

-Alex Blom-
Owner, Media Diseno


...

Sunny's Personal Blog

The Marketing Girl:
Out For Coffee!


...

The Marketing Girl: Un-Photoshopped!

www.flickr.com
This is a Flickr badge showing public photos from The Fallen Angel. Make your own badge here.
...

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